Shit my friends have said but changing their names for Dear Evan Hansen characters...
Connor: Lactose intolerance is a mindset
Jared: My gyatt is a very big adult man.
Evan: You're bursting down THERE!
Zoe: Piss me off again and I'll hit you with my big sexy white racist truck
Evan: I hate you all but if I stop being your friend I'd have to go back to being a lonely lesbian
Jared: I'LL SHOVE MY FOOT UP YOUR ANAL CANAL!
Connor: You're built like the bus driver's big toe
Evan: It's not anxiety if I'm not shaking *shakes casually*
Jared: FA- *sees a teachee* -BULOUS, that's what I was gonna say
Connor: I wish the bus would hit me-
Connor: All of them- bum, bum, bum, bum!
Evan: Do you even know how to do the Nazi salute?
Jared: *does the Nazi salute with the wrong arm*
Zoe: *turns around* Wrong arm, idiot, it's like this *does it properly*
Connor: I'm telling Hitler on you
(Teacher) Larry: Next one to salute during the film about pearl harbor is getting 3 detentions and an in school suspension *goes back to his desk*
Jared: I did nazi that coming
