Head Witch In Charge

I need all the hyperlexic statistical outliers on tumblr to look up what’s meant by low literacy, it means like, can’t read the notice from the electric company that says they’re cutting you off. Can’t read your doctor’s instructions on how to treat yourself at home. It means “school system failed you so badly that it might kill you”, if you’re reading simple fiction for fun you are already so far out of the window of maximum concern

i step out onto stage clad in full corpse paint and death metal regalia and start playing the most middle-of-the-road soft rock you've heard since 1974

by the nine we arefuckking under attack!!!!!!!!!

You show a cat something and they're like sniff sniff sniff sniff sniff sniff sniff ooooh I understand now. Don't care

humiliating to be attracted to a conventionally attractive person. I thought I was a more sensitive and refined pervert than this

(flirting) i could be your problem

“My emperor is fine” your emperor has commissioned over 8000 life-sized terracotta soldiers and buried them facing east, in the direction of his recently conquered enemies in the hopes that they will protect him in the afterlife.

DELETE THIS IMMEDIATELY

i am your naked 30yo mutual and that counts for something

🍓 $130 / $200 (July 9) 🍓