| It/he/they | nonhuman | collection of spooky creatures in a trenchcoat (plural system) | Big fan of having a silly fun time | | Banner by Bill Watterson | Imagine this says something funny and/or vaguely ominous
howdy, y'all can call me Creature/critter/bug/anything similar, or Onyx idc. I go by it/he/they (in order of preference)
Im agender and aroace, go my nothing identity
Im a minor but I will reblog posts about sex and drugs and whatnot if☝️ they are funny or informative. No hornyposting just creatures/characters with horns
Big fan of various "cringe" things, do whatever you want forever
my warning tags are usually just tagged as #thing (like #gore for example)
No DNI I have a block button and I'm not afraid to use it
Interaction is heavily encouraged even if we aren't mutuals, I love when people send me asks and tag me in posts
I post about whatever I want forever, I wouldn't recommend following me for any specific thing unless you can handle my epic multifandom power. That being said my current main interests are
-Music (just about anything that isn't insanely popular, with preference towards alt metal and anything you can define as "weird loser shit")
-media about spooky unnatural things (Supernatural, The Magnus Archives, Malevolent, etc)
-xenofiction (wings of fire and warrior cats)
-Science (mainly paleontology and astronomy)
-mine and my friends ocs (my current projects are How To Be Human and At Worlds Edge, I don't have any original posts about them but their tags are "oc world:[name]". You can always ask about them!!)
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If you were ever taught not to bother anyone unless it's really, really important, you might now struggle with the idea that no really, your friends would love to hear from you just because and not only when one of you is in crisis
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i think we should talk about degendering more as a very real form of transphobia. you should not be calling a trans woman "they" when she's explained her pronouns to you. you should not be calling her a "person" instead of a woman. she's not too gnc, she's not too androgynous, you're not "confused" about her identity, you're degendering her. I fear we've gotten to a point we've forgotten the very basics of this movement is "trans women are women" and "trans men are men", and not just "trans people are someone who's pronouns you have to memorize so you don't offend them." you see her as a man in a dress and it pisses me off
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tbh when i hear some people talk about 'breaking cycles of abuse', it becomes clear pretty quickly who has come to understand that phrase to mean 'since i was a victim of abuse/neglect by my parents/caretaker/s i will do everything to be nothing like them' and that is all. its not a completely flawed way of thinking either - something that hurt you would very likely hurt someone else; through empathy we learn to understand not to hurt others the way we were hurt too.
but what 'breaking cycles' looks like is more complicated than just not being your parents/caretakers - it's about recognizing how the things that happened to you changed you and how you can heal so you don't hurt someone else in turn. the survival skills you learned in an unhealthy enviroment often translate to poor if not unhealthy interpersonal skills in an enviroment where things ARE safe.
its a difficult pill to swallow for a lot of survivors of abuse (trust me, i know) because we have a tendency to simply want our pain to be recognized. by painting yourself as "absolutely nothing like my abuser" you can abstain from recognizing your own harmful tendencies and live comfortably in the role of victim hood for the rest of your life. it can be tempting to do this especially when so many people will do their best to deny what you experienced - almost like leaning into a stuck door that just won't budge.
the problem with this is if you never recognize that being mistreated made it so you LACK a lot of what other people learned from a loving enviroment, you can hurt people pretty badly even when doing your best just not to replicate what your parents/caretakers got wrong.
this also hurts for victims because, when it comes down to it - it's not FAIR. you were hurt for no reason, and most of us will never hear an apology or even admittance from the person who did it - so why do YOU have to change? why do YOU, the person hurt unjustly, have to put in the work?
and i mean. that's what breaking a cycle is. it means pushing against what's fair and comfortable deliberately so that you can stop something that's been repeating. it's work. its not just recognition of pain, it's the purposeful healing and treatment of it. but thats scary, and it's not fun, so a lot of people fall right back into it. its a lot easier said than done.
> medical problem
> unsure if it's serious or will go away on its own
> sees a doctor to be sure
> "why the fuck are you here. this is nothing. it will go away on its own"
> medical problem
> unsure if it's serious or will go away on its own
> decide to wait to not overreact
> problem remains
> sees doctor with concrete problem after all
> "why did you wait so long. we could have done something if you had come immediately"
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