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"you heard it too, right?"

[ jojamart mockumentary #26 ]

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#My boy is a bit slow #I don’t doubt his skills but honey a mile in 15 minutes still only 4 mph ❤️

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isawken

going over to my minimalist girlfriend’s house and she apologizes profusely for the mess and there’s just a single perfect, fresh pea on the floor of her living room

Blue Lois

can i help you

Red Marge

jesus christ. I Am Under Fucking Attack

worldheritagepostorganization

World Heritage Post

isawken

i deserve a medal for this post. not because i was particularly funny but because i survived an onslaught of nearly one hundred gimmick blogs in the wake of this post popping off, and the fact that i didn’t try to track any of them down and snuff them out with my bare hands is a testament to my immeasurable strength and should be rewarded. at one point i had “the official letter h” add on to this post. you wanna know that blog’s gimmick? the really funny and original and worthwhile gimmick the official letter h blog had? yep you guessed it they just gave me the god damned letter H and then fucked off. only jesus knows the suffering i endured over that harsh winter, and he wept for me

pointless-achievements

Rare Achievement Unlocked:

After The Clouds Clear

Sorry, I don't give out medals, this is the best I can do.

tweetingukpolitics

ravioliraz

itspronouncedfeckyou

yeah okay sure you're a cosmic being beyond human comprehension. im a comic being beyond human comprehension. and they love me

itspronouncedfeckyou

they love me

itspronouncedfeckyou

youu cantm dk this to me.,

itspronouncedfeckyou

IM BEING CURUSED.

unyieldingsilence

‎

baddywronglegs

I've asked this question before and been surprised by the results, now I have access to more weirdos it's your problem:

It is the middle of a Sunday afternoon. You have nothing on, and aren't expecting visitors, deliveries or post.

Unexpectedly, there is a knock at the door.

Which of these would surprise you more to find on the doorstep?

Fairy

Walrus

Voting ended onFeb 26, 2024

baddywronglegs

Not naming options to skew votes but...

I think there's something fundamentally baffling with the way most of you think.

formlesschromatic

troacctid

Happy birthday to this iconic poll

unyieldingsilence

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theonion

Adopting a tougher stance against the increasingly widespread form of workplace corruption, U.S. Department of Labor officials announced plans Thursday to crack down on people getting paid for their work. “For far too long, the practice of receiving money for services has gone unchecked, and today we’re turning over evidence to the attorney general so that individuals complicit in such activities can be prosecuted,” said acting Labor Secretary Keith Sonderling, noting that Americans found guilty of accepting paychecks, healthcare benefits, retirement fund contributions, or other financial compensation from their employers could face up to 40 years in federal prison.

Full Story

catchymemes

satan-offical

whenever I watch a movie where people are like dismembering someone alive and they're all chanting "hail satan hail satan" I always think "WOAH WOAH WOAHH GUY'S I NEVER ASKED YOU TO DO THIS! I DON'T NEED YOU TO DO THIS! I HAVE A TUMBLR ACCOUNT YOU CAN FOLLOW ME ON!"

the-actual-jesus-h-christ

I kind of don’t want to believe you, but at the same time I know what it’s like to have a toxic fandom.

satan-offical

Jesus You Don't Get To Talk You're About To Be Tumblr Sexy Man

the-haiku-bot

Jesus You Don’t Get

To Talk You’re About To Be

Tumblr Sexy Man

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

the-one-eyed-seer

Shoutout to disabled people who like hiking

Shoutout to mobility aid users who like walks

Shoutout to light sensitive people who like being outside

Shoutout to wheelchair users specifically who like going outdoors

Being disabled isn’t antithetical to appreciating nature

fortunatelychaoticphantom

I swear to fucking god. I would claw out OneDrive from my computer if I could. I would burn down their servers if I could. I would run down their stocks to the ground if I could. I hope every single one of their workers gets a better offer from a competitor in the next 24 hours. I hope every single one of their light bulbs explodes at the same time. I hope every single carton of milk in their fridge will always be expired.

Stop backing up my fucking files.

Stop asking me to back up my fucking files.

Stop taking my fucking files off my fucking computer.

I don't want a fucking reminder in three fucking days. Let me fucking say no.

Fuckers.

prismatic-bell

Friend, I have news you're gonna love. Here's a text tutorial to get rid of that shit on Windows 10.

Here's a text tutorial to get rid of that shit on Windows 11.

Here's a video tutorial to get rid of that shit on Windows 10.

Here's a video tutorial to get rid of that shit on Windows 11.

Go forth. Be free.

ophilosoraptoro

Reblog to save a life... and someone's sanity

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sunstormbudgie

we need a word for patterns on animals that are in between spots and stripes. like what servals have

#Spripe 👍

tiktoksthataregood-ish

teatops

That “I think I fucked up” was timed perfectly

‎

‎

SEIS fag sex? En esta economia?

no-one-offical

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unyieldingsilence

‎

quaintpanic

I WAS BORN YESTERDAY. I JUST BLEW IN FROM STUPID TOWN. THIS IS MY FIRST RODEO. PLEASE BE PATIENT WITH ME.

ouroborosorder

are you 'dark' chuuni or are you 'woke' chuuni

i have been staring at this post for 5 minutes trying to think of a yes-and that's funny enough to live up to it but i just can't

ouroborosorder

I muted this post last night what the fuck happened while I was gone

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Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

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Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming