Cato!

this is going around again and the tags are full of people talking about printing it out to put in their breakroom or cubicle or sending it to their coworkers, which fills me with great joy. vast diversity of professions represented also. zoos. labs. summer camps. restaurants. garden centers. libraries. schools. many reports from the brave warriors of assorted retail. a truth universally acknowledged: if there is a sign a customer will not read it <3 and they don't read emails either <3

DO NOT DOWNLOAD TUMBLR it will install a virus on your device called tumblr

What no one tells you about loving The Amazing Devil is that when you'll want to sing along to an entire album at some point you'll have to start fighting against tears and maybe even sobs – and you'll, of course, have to power through because stopping halfway through an album is a crime. Who cares if you're slightly dehydrated by the end of the whole ordeal, do it for the love of the art.

"don't post that, what if an employer sees?" personally i think employers need to stay the fuck off their employees' social media lmao

stop normalizing employers invading employees' privacy ❤️❤️❤️

we need to bring back public hatred for paparazzi. I’m so tired of actors defending themselves against assholes with cameras and being smeared as egotistical divas. they’re glorified stalkers who get paid to harass people. end of. the things these freaks get away with would send normal people to prison but we’re supposed to think it’s okay just bc they’re paparazzi. they SHOULD get shut down for being openly misogynistic. they SHOULD get told off and reported for following someone to their private residence to doxx them. they SHOULD face charges for just about running people over in their pursuit of the next hot celeb. this is not normal. and, actually, these people DO deserve to get punched sometimes.

i love sibling estrangement as horror. Only one person in the entire world has been through what youve been through and they deny it . Awesome

For the sake of letting the full story be known: you have to imagine that after another moment of horrified silence, Dead Wife giy bursts out laughing and says, with a bittersweet smile "yeah, that was her sense of humor..."

Oh fuck that's right I neglected the most important part of this.

“Do dishes” and “take out trash” both require the use of a spell slot, vs “use phone” is a cantrip, and brother, I am a level one wizard

@this-is-trans-joy

This is trans joy!!!

Yeah I saw the lovecraftian horrors and didn’t succumb to madness. What- no I’m not a cultist, James. For Christ’s sake. What you’re forgetting my friend is that HP Lovecraft wasn’t a flexible man. His brain simply wasn’t stretchy enough to take it all in. I however, have short term memory issues. Flexibility is the name of the game when you can’t remember if you ate lunch or not. What’s the size of the universe? Big. You knew that already, James. Come on now. You don’t need to witness the terrifying ocean at the base of the entirety of reality itself to know that. Pass the brandy.

You must imagine the character I’ve created here wearing a suit and a monocle, by the way.

"this is not for you" isn't just the House of Leaves book dedication. it's also something you can say to a cat while you're trying to enjoy a meal