Spotify Release Gaydar

big pharma will try to sell u $20 cold medicine like spicy ramen doesnt cost like a dollar a pack and orgasms are free

big chemist will try to sell you £20 paracetamol like beans dont cost like a quid a can and havin a wank costs fock all

Fun thing about football right now is that there's a move called the "brotherly shove" that the Eagles do when they're very close to scoring, where the whole team puts their hands on the ass of the guy with the ball and physically propels him over the line into the endzone for the touchdown, and all the other teams' fans hate it because it's got such a ridiculously high rate of success for the Eagles and doesn't really seem to work for any other team. People are straight-up calling for this move to be banned, claiming it's "unstoppable" and gives an "unfair advantage" but it really and truly is a skill issue. The whole league hates this move because it only makes the Eagles win more often and nobody else can figure out how to do it right

coffee shop by my house hired a new barista who is extraordinarily hot and flirts with me incessantly but she also makes the worst - and i truly mean the worst - coffee i’ve ever paid for. atrociously bad. just another of god’s little jokes

just remembered the barista who worked there last year and treated me with an attitude generally reserved for children and the incompetent to the point where she would frequently adjust my drink order in front of me and every single time it was BANGIN’

#cloth barista wire barista

"save me, substance abuse!" i cry. before you can moralize to me about the dangers of addiction, a noble and powerful steed gallops into the room - my horse whom i have named "substance abuse". you learn an important lesson about making assumptions. i snort a line off its back

elf yuri except one of them is high fantasy and the other is one of santa's

The celebrity Ben & Jerry's ice cream flavors being some of the best ones is like the retail equivalent of having to go to a restaurant and order a rootin tootin yeehaw cowboy burger or something

we need 15-20 episode seasons again these limited series have the worst pacing in the world and none of the character decisions hold any weight

we are slowly killing the difference between television and movies. tv seasons have 6-8 hour long episodes. movies are part 1 and part 2 and both halves are nearly 3 hours long. both of them have too much time and not enough time for the characters to struggle and grow and change. what makes a story better suited for television or film is becoming irrelevant because we are erasing the distinctions and that's bad for both of them!!!