james marsters

BTVS was soooooo crazy because joss whedon was like "I'm going to write an incel revenge fantasy where I turn the leather wearing bad boy I was jealous of in high school into a loser cuck! I'm going to literally paralyze him from the waist down so his dick doesn't work and then make him watch his girlfriend make out with a guy taller than him and call that guy daddy in front of him! I'm going to write a million scenes of him getting beat up by girls and even show him having to be rescued by a girl in a princess carry and another scene where he gets tortured by a girl and have mad scientists metaphorically castrate him in on a lab table and I'll write a weirdly homoerotic scene in which the boyfriend of the woman he's in love with breaks into his home and shoves him against a wall and impales him with a plastic phallic object" and james marsters was like "sounds hot I can't wait to play this character I'm going to make him look slutty and turned on the entire time" and five million teen girls gays and theys in the viewing audience had the weirdest possible sexual awakening

What if Buffy's mom hadn't found out about slaying at the end of season 2 and Buffy had to convince Spike to stay in town and pretend to be in a band with her because that was the cover story they'd told Joyce

And then eventually end up accidentally actually starting a band because it’s easier than maintaining the lie

Joyce says they can use the garage to rehearse and she always makes them snacks. Buffy starts to worry she'll never get Spike to leave

Buffy insists on calling the band Slayer and Spike keeps failing to convince her that there’s already a band with that name

Low key I feel like Buffy would just see it as a cover and it’s a ‘fake band’ but Spike gets like way into it and it’s a Real Band™️ to him and he’s a little annoyed Buffy doesn’t take it as seriously. He’s always like “you missed practice this Tuesday what the hell’s up with that. We have a gig next week btw”

#he starts trailing after her on patrol to bitch about missing practice or how she's sloppy on her chords #starts pitching in on the slayage because vampires keep interrupting his tirades #''EXCUSE ME we are having a ROW'' *stakes fledgling* #no chip necessary spike is literally the guy in the band with zero chill about the band #he undeads the band. he unbreathes the band. he spends all his time not sleeping... on the band. #(willow is their manager xander is the merch guy) #(giles was secretly plotting to lure spike into a trap until he notices spike is... actually better at corralling buffy on patrol than he is #because spike doesn't want her injuring her hands or doing anything that fucks with her breath control) #(giles is also weak to the nostalgia of it all and tunes their instruments when he thinks they're not looking) #(when faith arrives mid-S3 she's quickly recruited to sing backup) (via @entirelytookeen)

#Buffy at their next concert: hi this is my Fake band and you're at my Fake concert#Fake band fans go NUTS when the Fake lead singer pulls her signature move: peacing out mid-song to go beat up some guys out back#Meanwhile: extended guitar and drum solos#the fans eat. that. gimmick. up.#Buffy returning covered in blood an hour later: oh god you're still going. Okay Fake second song here we go#and the crowd goes WILD

spikes blue fucking versace top that makes him look so snatched

vampires are so full of shit. "oh the human race is beneath us, you're just livestock to us" I don't think you know what livestock is. do you feed us? care for us? protect us from predators? no. you just slink around dark alleys and ambush people. that's not what a higher being does. that's a bottom feeder. a parasite. karate punches your head off

She Would Say That. She would DO that.