Ert N Stuff

okay one time i worked at this natural winery which meant our wines weren’t filtered or anything. all about back to the land and soil or some shit. so picture this: you’re freshly 21 years old working a farmers market in the richest part of seattle by yourself. this very nice, very fancy lady comes up to the booth. ‘um, i need to return this bottle of wine because there’s a wasp in it.’ she hands you the bottle. you look inside. boom. big ass fuckin wasp floating in there. deer in headlights moment. wtf do i do now that my boss sold this lady wasp wine. you swap out the bottle and give her a free hummus too as an apology. so then you text your boss super worried ‘hey someone came back to return a bottle with a wasp in it.’ and he replies going ‘ha ha wasp wine. the sediment in all of them is actually dissolved wasp.’ no concern no nothin. hello????? likeee he was actually hyped to be the wasp in your wine guy

what a beautiful time of year everyone is growing veegtables for me spacifically, one problem though you need to make fences shorter im sure its a mistake but i cant reach some of them

hello imptortant message from deer youyr doing it agen. i cant eet the vegbals you are growing for me like this

if I ever tell you “lmk what you think if you read/play/watch it!” I am firmly inviting you to send me a play by play minute by minute cataloguing of your thoughts about The Thing

get invested in that girl side character with no character. give that girl side character life and a storied history. Make that girl character practically an oc with how much you're inventing about her. I believe in you!

*guy who doesn't know anything about sports and has never cared about sports in his life* hey did you know womens professional baseball is returning after 70 years and the games are going to be streamed for free on youtube and the season starts august 1st

having a multi year long character obsession becomes like a abstract thought experiment at some point