˗ˏˋOn Top of the Universeˊˎ˗

badminton is dont hit the fucking ground you stupid disgusting baby bird

Hockey is I’m gonna launch this peppermint patty at you and the only way to stop me is violence

curling is my two friends and i really want to put a watermelon in that exact spot, but the floor disagrees

relay racing is "here, you take this leek"

Ultimate Frisbee is equal parts "Quick, gimme that pie!" and "Fuck, get this pie away from me!"

And polo is "fuck this apple specifically, and my horse agrees".

something I really appreciate rian johnson for doing in the benoit blanc mysteries is that he allows the victims of the bad guys to get PISSED and SHOUTY at them. Helen gets to vent her anger at Miles Bron and it's RIGHTOUS. Vera calls Wicks what he is at the top of her lungs. Blanc constantly calls the bad guys out on their shit. and that's so appreciated in a world where it feels like we can't do that anymore without being instantly turned into a excuse to cause further violence or being "unreasonable". we just can't be angry anymore.

ideal five nights at freddy's adaptation would not be a feature film but rather an hour long mock defunctland video