AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

In 3rd Edition there were five official NPC classes (with a sixth introduced in Eberron), and they were for the most part mundane, giving mechanics for various hirelings (expert), regular 1HD humanoids (warrior), and the traditional "primitive" humanoid spellcasters (adept), also answered the question "what if a 0-level character could gain levels at being 0-level?" (commoner).

2nd Edition had a more robust selection of less generic classes such as Apothecary, Blacksmith, and Cartographer, which used the delightful experience system of the game to gain levels by doing their professional tasks rather than adventuring ones. But once again these are mostly just for your hireling types.

In 3rd Edition there were five official NPC classes (with a sixth introduced in Eberron), and they were for the most part mundane, giving mechanics for various hirelings (expert), regular 1HD humanoids (warrior), and the traditional "primitive" humanoid spellcasters (adept), also answered the question "what if a 0-level character could gain levels at being 0-level?" (commoner).

2nd Edition had a more robust selection of less generic classes such as Apothecary, Blacksmith, and Cartographer, which used the delightful experience system of the game to gain levels by doing their professional tasks rather than adventuring ones. But once again these are mostly just for your hireling types.

When I turned 17, we ordered a cake at the grocery store for my party, as we’d done many times before. If you wanted something written on the cake you’d write it into a section of the order form. We requested, very simply, “Happy Birthday Courtney”. When we went to pick it up the day of the party, this is what we got.

The bakery employees had absolutely no explanation for this. The order form, attached to the box, very clearly did not contain any of those extra names. Whomever had done the writing was no longer in, so there was no one to ask how this had happened. The fact that the name ‘Juan’ is misspelled bewilders me to this day. (I’ve never seen ‘Miley’ without the E, either, but it’s believable that someone might spell it that way.) Did this cake slip in from an alternate universe where I’m one quarter of a set of Hispanic quadruplets? Dyslexic Hispanic quadruplets, maybe?

This cake became the focal point of my party. At least two of my friends regularly called me ‘Courtney Mily Jaun Pablo’ for years to come. My siblings and I still reference it sometimes, eleven years later. It is probably the funniest thing ever to occur at any birthday celebration of my life, and may well remain so for the rest of my days.

No One Like You

now, it took us a while to realise it meant "(there is) no one like you". at first, we all parsed it as a botched "no one like(s) you"

first: you know that the content creators you follow are sex workers, right? who are putting time and effort and often money in, even if there isn’t something like an OF account or whatever legitimizes it in your mind? and work does imply like. money, often. i apologize if that idea is yucky for you, but you are in fact receiving things people have worked on and put effort into for free. so that’s neat for you! but perhaps you should consider living up to your leftist ideals and paying them.

second: even ignoring the work part. this is the Get Close To Artists website. right? and being a literal professional artist myself, in my normie job, i am putting a lot of things i spent years into learning into Posting. i am creating Art. yes? right? so you are tipping and buying merch and prints from your most beloved artists, right? right?

Do you hate traffic? Yeah. It’s because of all the cars.

Do you hate noise? Yeah. It’s because of all the cars.

Do you hate so many people under the age of 30 dying? Yeah. It’s because of all the cars.

Tired of having to drive around your elderly, young, and disabled relatives? Blame all the cars.

Tired of air and water pollution? Yeah a lot of that comes from cars.

Tired of potholes? It’s because there’s so many cars.

More severe flooding than there used to be? Because of all the asphalt for the cars.

Is your city losing money and can’t afford to maintain suburban sewer and sidewalks? Cars.