you've met me at a very "yeah i'm trying to work on that" time in my life

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you've met me at a very "yeah i'm trying to work on that" time in my life

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men's wrestling promos are so fucking horny it's hysterical. They will be shirtless, dickprint out, glistening, yelling "I'm going to TOP this man in the RING. I'm going to TAKE his ASS and leave his body QUIVERING. I'm going to FIST this man to a PROSTATE ORGASM" and then the commentators are just like "fighting words from the champ there"
Yeah
(X)
Higgledy-piggledy unparliamentary green parrots quarrel outside in the trees
Squawking out epithets uncomplimentary Squads of unmannerly Oversized peas.
okay. breathe. listen to my voice. can you tell me five things in this room you can fuck?
okay great. now list me four things in this room you can kill.
beautiful. there you go. okay. now: tell me three things you can impose unjust taxes on.
almost done. can you list two things you could shove in a pipe and smoke?
last one: one thing you could use as a makeshift weapon?
why are you still crying

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i think something a lot of people don't get is that years of mocking your child, even in jest, does in fact tend to get under their skin
a decade or two of even light verbal harassment is very much accentuated when it's an authority figure you are in every meaningful way subservient to
jokes have an element of truth in them!
repetition changes the meaning of something!
if someone jokes about something once, it means they noticed that thing at least the one time they felt the need to say it. if someone jokes about something multiple times a year over the course of decades, it means they're thinking about that thing all the time and definitely have non-joke serious thoughts about it
The most basic, intractable fact about mental illnesses is that you simply cannot willpower your way out of them. The only exceptions to this rule are the ones I have, which continue to disable me due to lack of determination and other grave personal flaws
ah doing ma thing just like god int- (remembers im atheist) just like the universe intend- (remembers i don't believe in determinism) just like noone and nothing intended ever. doin ma thang fucking unpredictable style
“i also choose this guy’s dead wife” was easily the #1 funniest thing to ever be written on the internet.
you can know the punchline but you can’t stop it from punching you.
i do also feel the need to add that phil8248 really liked the joke. he said his wife had always had a dark sense of humour, even about her illness and death, and seeing the joke made him feel like he was laughing with her one last time.

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A three-circle venn-diagram where the circles are "sex workers", "the furry community", and "people working in morgues". I don't know what the overlap parts are.
Fourth circle needed: IT workers
You say that with such confidence that I am compelled to trust your vision. Personally I have no idea where this is going.
i'd say the overlap between "sex workers" and "people who work in morgues" is probably "seeing naked strangers a lot"
"professional handling of bodies of strangers"?
Putting my neck out for you folks here
image description: a four-circle venn diagram. the four main circles are "it professionals", "furries", "sex workers", and "morgue workers", with the following overlaps:
it professionals + furries: computers fear them
it professionals + furries + sex workers: good chance of being trans
it professionals + morgue workers: prefers when clients don't talk to them
it professionals + morgue workers + furries: prefer non-human company
it professionals + morgue workers + sex workers: nobody could handle this job
furries + sex workers: fetishized
furries + sex workers + morgue workers: putting bodies in ill-fitting containers
sex workers + morgue workers: paid to handle naked strangers
all four: social ostracism
I got curious, so without looking up the reddit thread because I hate reddit, I went to the list of Barbie's careers. Because of course people have dated lists of those.
Her first 28 years are fairly tame, until we reach 1987's Canadian Mountie Barbie. Reasonable odds for a cop, even if they're not a USAmerican cop.
in 1991, we get US Air Force Pilot Barbie, US Marine Corps Sergeant Barbie, US Navy Petty Officer Barbie. There's also 1992's US Army Barbie, if those guys were feeling left out. I'm also ignoring the 1989 US Army Barbie because that one is 100% a stolen valour runway look, not a uniform.
Going to run my autism over those four.
US Navy Petty Officer Barbie is wearing quartermaster's rating insignia, so no combat for her.
US Army Barbie is wearing an airborne maroon beret with no rank insignia that I could see, but she's loaded down with medical supplies, so I'm gonna say combat medic, but only as many kills as her other medical endeavours.
US Air Force Pilot Barbie is wearing a jacket that looks like a Top Gun tie-in. The unit patch is just the USAF coat of arms, and the name patch says she's a Captain. VERY confusingly, the plane on the box art is an F-5, which had just recently been retired. But its USAF usage was almost all in the OPFOR Aggressor squadrons, which is... "come play enemy planes for our training exercises".
US Marine Corps Sergeant Barbie is wearing E-5 Sergeant's insignia, and three medals (she's in dress uniform). To my eye, and allowing for badly printed colours, looks like Navy and Marine Achievement Medal, Marine Corps Good Conduct Medal, and the South West Asia Service Medal. The first two are fairly obvious "Barbie Is Well Behaved" stuff, but uh. That last one though?
USMC Barbie was in Desert Storm.
And if she was in a support role there, well, 1993 gave us USAmerican Cop Barbie. Case closed.
this shit sucks. wish bulbasaur was real .
there should be a cool, chill way to say things like “I’m struggling” or “I’m having a hard time” that doesn’t imply you might have needs
They should invent a me that wants to do tasks. And maybe if they’re feeling generous, a me that feels good after completing a task, too.

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gender to me is like a car i dont really want one and society would be much better if it was not structured around it. but i got one because it helps me get around and sometimes its fun to make it go fast
I’ve been reading about werewolves on Wikipedia and I just have to say. “Werewolves are warriors that descend into hell to fight demons” kicks unbelievable amounts of ass as a concept