Socrates of the Socket Set

Happy Moon Landing Eve! Remember to leave out milk and cookies for Buzz Aldrin and Neil Armstrong, and don’t let Michael Collins convince you to prank NASA!

Headcanon that because Data doesn't need to eat he really only uses the replicator in his quarters for spot's food so whenever someone replicates something she thinks it's for her. Geordi gets a cup of coffee in the morning and spot hears the replicator sound and just immediately runs up to him meowing

It's so important to me that spot is an absolute menace and also Data's special little baby. She wants a snack so bad. She demands it

Human beings b like. *sits and stares peacefully at a fire* *sits and stares peacefully at the ocean* *sits and stares peacefully at a sleeping animal*

A free-range group therapy called "get herded, idiot", where you and everyone in your group is set loose to run around on an open field while a highly trained shepherd dog tries to keep you all in one group. I am not sure what benefit this would have for anyone involved.

This would fix everyone involved including the dog

so the synopsis of The Ring is: you will die 7 days after watching this videotape. my question is does that apply to rewatching the tape. let's say I watch the tape, wait 6 days, and watch it again. does the timer reset to 7 days? can I do this indefinitely? can I become functionally immortal by watching the evil videotape on a weekly basis?

My late father was the one who taught me to be cynical about advertising, for all that putting up ads was literally his whole job. He taught me from a very young age that advertising is expensive, and they tack that cost onto the price. That if something is heavily advertised, you can count on the fact that there's an identical product out there, usually even manufactured in the same factory, that's cheaper because they don't spend all that money on advertising.

Why Name Brand Products Are Beneath You: The Honor and Glory of Buying Generic 

its ok theyre Gods lil helpers

And boy are they clumsy

Hi, these bees are babies! They’re not clumsy at all, this is what is called orientation flights. After birth and before beginning their careers as foragers (as all Honey bees cycle through all the jobs in the Hive throughout their lifespan), Honey bees take short flights back and forth, to and from the Hive, to orient themselves with their wings and their home so they can learn its location and how to get back home after foraging! Everyone has to learn, these are just smol little baby turkeys. Bees use the angle of the sun for location so adults have a better and more direct sense of location than any human

BONK!

I love visiting people who have some kind of pet reptile because they're always like "would you like to hold the reptile" and I'm like "of course I would" and then the rest of the conversation happens with me just holding a random reptile and the reptile Has No Feelings about the situation. They always just sit there, probably vaguely wishing to return to their heat lamp but clearly exuding an energy of This Might As Well Happen. and then I put it back in its enclosure and go home and the reptile very clearly has no strong feelings about the situation.

singing along to songs in a language I don't know as if I have any fucking clue what they're saying, YIPPEEEEE

what I've learned from having other people edit my work is that I have a sick addiction to commas

there have been four editing passes on my spider sex book, and each time they take away so many commas. no fresh commas are being added, this is just a continued culling. if you see a comma in the final book please understand that it survived so much