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@sochilll
Hey y'all I made a ko-fi! No pressure ofc just an option if you enjoy my stuff and want to toss me a couple bucks :)

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thing that are not and can never be art: fanfiction
video games
animation
film
books
art
and just when you think youāre at your absolute lowest a blonde motherfucker comes along and makes everything so much worse
Also why give Ravi ambitions to leave his hometown just to take them away because he found a damn marshmallow in his bag that was so goofy I'm sorry
Rewatching season 1 of AGGGTM because I didn't realize season 2 was out and I am once again annoyed at how accidental everything is. Barely an ounce of detective work in the whole 6 episodes

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Had been thinking about this post (which is a fake excerpt from an imaginary narrative written to mock 'tumblr prose'), and how most "no actually this is good" comments are highlighting how the construction of individual sentences is interesting, how some of the language is evocative, how it Goes Hard. Because that post is written badly in a very thoughtful manner that focuses on core structural issues rather than going for low hanging fruit of poor technical proficiency with the written word, it is not bad in the most "obvious" of ways. So I think this is a legit learning opportunity, but also I don't want to dunk on anyone so instead I will just preach to the choir of My Followers.
But yeah like to be more constructive than just going "lol tumblr prose bad", really the issue in Large part that characterizes "tumblr prose" (which to be clear I don't think is a discrete thing and at most is a combination of several writing tendencies influenced by the medium of Online) comes down to the lack of real contrast in Any aspect of narrative construction, and an obsession with being quotable and constantly being at 100% of Going Hard (which go hand in hand).
In that post, the character voice is indistinct from that of the narration, and the characters quote one-liners that look Meaningful as excerpts and are borderline nonsensical as dialogue. There is no more than the faintest, most generic hints of characterization; these people exist as vague concepts to say deep words for the reader. The sentence length has little variation from its staccato beat, and so it is awkward to read and fails to complement the action or accomplish anything with the pacing (save for the slight slowdown when the torturer feels all that damp animal electricity). The timing is awkward and exaggeratedly dramatic. The description is a flowery kind of tryhard visceral and seems avoidant of describing anything too directly ("something dark and arterial" where there's nothing being accomplished by conveying uncertainty about what is currently gushing out of the injured character and the simple use of "blood splashed across the stones" would actually be 10x more effective), in a way that does disservice to what is supposed to be a torture scene, and leaves it weightless and ungrounded. In fairness to the people saying "this is good", that is MUCH easier to say when reading this fake excerpt as the standalone piece it actually is, but this kind of writing Cannot function in an actual narrative and is not what an excerpt from well constructed narrative fiction is going to look like basically ever.
It reflects a lot of very typical amateur writing issues that just about everyone has to grow out of (the minimal diversity in sentence length, simulated non-attention to scene pacing and timing), and issues common to fanfiction-influenced writing on social media (allergy to paragraph lengths of more than two sentences, little to no description of the characters or setting because, in fanfiction, the reader already knows their physical characteristics and mannerisms and it doesn't need to be lingered upon, Unlike In Original Fiction). But this particularly hits on an issue I think is semi-unique to narrative writing in the social media milieu, which is a focus on being quotable. This may not even be a conscious impulse at all But It's There. This kinda apparent terror of any moment not being as beautiful and hard hitting as possible (or for comedy, any moment not being A Joke). Everything "Goes Hard", so nothing actually does. A lot of "tumblr prose" type writing is less a narrative, more a string of quotes loosely assembled into narrative that vaguely gestures at things like Plot and Character. It substitutes depth for Suggestions of depth by utilizing stock symbolism without building it into the narrative, and by gesturing at weighty contexts without actually engaging with them. There can be little contrast or effective use of tone, pace, description when your story is a series of Hard Hitting Quotes.
I'm reading Watership Down right now and I think it's a great novel overall and can work as an example of how important it is to utilize contrast in your writing.
This segment is the lengthy first description of the titular down, which the rabbits are now encountering for the first time:
Adams is slowing the pace here to introduce us to the setting of the next segment of the book. The average sentence length is very long and keeps us lingering in the sensory detail, while still varied and thus smoothly readable. This new place is introduced by simultaneously conveying its physical description in vivid detail and conveying its feeling and character, and getting the most out of every described feature to do so. The thorn trees are "wind stunted". The air is "scented". The language takes on a very flowery character and heavily utilizes simile and metaphor. Woodland is "tumultuous with evening", sunlight filters through grass "like a wind" to the small creatures below, in contrast to laying "like a gold rind" on the hill when seen from a distance. This grandiose description is heavily functional and conveys both exhaustive physical detail and a feeling that this place is beautiful, awe inspiring to something like a rabbit, and full of life, though not without quiet hints of danger. It hits because Not Everything In The Book Is Described This Way. It means something that we're lingering like this and stopping to get a sense of this place on every possible level, and moving away from more direct, simple prose to convey the feeling of the place in depth.
This segment describes the rabbit Bigwig being found caught in a snare:
The prose here here has the opposite approach of the first excerpt. The language is concise, direct, and brutal. It only veers slightly away from the literal to describe Bigwig's voice as 'bubbling out' from his mouth, both conveying that the saliva and blood in his mouth is literally bubbling as he speaks, and implying the unsettling way his voice sounds as he's being strangled. The sentences are much shorter on the whole, as fit for the pacing of a tense and rapidly changing scene, and the timing closely complements the action - "There was a pause" not only conveys That There Was A Pause but interrupts the rhythm of this segment; the moment of uneasy stillness is echoed in the act of reading itself.
The scene this is excerpted from is extremely effective and does in fact Go Hard, it's well constructed in of itself but its effectiveness mostly lies in its place in the narrative. It's the culmination of a long, tense buildup as the reader becomes more aware that something is deeply Wrong about the place the rabbits are in, and the payoff is effective in being blunt and visceral, which hits because Not Everything In The Book Is Described This Way. Nothing about these excerpts are particularly quotable because that is actually not what good narrative writing is about.
This got me thinking a lot.
I think there's something to be said about diversity of reading/writing. I think it's probably good for someone who enjoys writing to read a lot of different things, even things they don't like, things that challenge them. I also understand a... potential frustration? of reading the same kind of thing over and over, especially if you simply don't like it.
But another part of this feels kind of... elitist? Judgy? This is likely influenced by my own bias, since I'm one of those freaks that enjoyed reading the 'designed to be bad writing' thing. Nonetheless, I'm reminded of this post about 'the wisdom of repugnance' or 'argument from disgust'. What do we mean when we say a piece of writing is bad? Writing might be uninformed, or difficult to understand, or contain hateful stereotypes. And those things are bad. But that doesn't seem to be what the above post is saying. There's statements like "lack of contrast" and "obsession with being quotable" and indistinctness of character and narrator voice and dialogue being nonsensical, that it's flowery and tryhard and "cannot function". The idea that if everything is 'goes hard', nothing is 'goes hard'. And I guess my question is... what's wrong with that? It's funny because the piece that is cited as 'this is good writing' I actually found quite tedious and boring! But that's my point - I found it tedious and boring. I, personally, didn't like it. Maybe that means I'm uncultured, or naive, or amateur, but... so what? If there is an argument from disgust, then perhaps there's also an 'argument from cringe' - the idea that if something feels cringeworthy, it must be inherently bad. I think that just means... you don't like it. And that's fine! I just don't think the reader should be demanding something specific from any one author. Funnily, I also don't think the author should demand anything of the reader! It's interesting because the 'bad writing' post does just that: it was meant to be an over-the-top example of awful writing, but many people didn't react the way they were 'supposed to'. (somewhat tangentially, this also got me thinking about uniqueness vs. conformity. uniqueness is often valued much more over conformity, and broadly speaking I'm inclined to agree? but i also think that there's nothing wrong with a group of people adopting familiar characteristics and sharing community jokes or a common form of prose with each other. it feels like a stylish haircut that a lot of people like. sure, a mean person can bully someone for being different. but who cares if you're dressing or writing the way other people dress or write, even if it's cringe, or amateur, or lacks contrast, or can't function as part of a larger narrative? if it feels familiar, and comfortable, and makes you happy, then enjoy it. read it. write it. make it. whatever!!)
I think we run into an issue here where writing for fun as a mode of free creative expression and people actually desiring to improve their craft and succeed within a specific literary medium are Two Overlapping But Different Things. Writing is creative expression, of course you can have fun and do whatever the hell you want! But writing is also communication, storytelling, and there are ways to communicate ideas and tell stories more effectively. There are rules to different traditions of storytelling for a reason. These rules do not exist to be elitist (though there is another discussion to be had about how western literature is elevated by western readers over other traditions and its norms are treated as universal), they donāt even exist as solid immutable lines (any rule can be broken effectively With Understanding of why that rule is convention to begin with), they exist because these are constructive elements that lend towards more successful storytelling and more accurate conveyance of your ideas within a narrative medium.
Youāll notice that I never objected to the actual content of the story or individual word choices unless I had a technical criticism surrounding it (outside of the one little jab at āwet animal electricityā), because thatās taste and thatās subjective (I do believe expression of taste has a place in criticism, but not when you're trying to talk about technique) but rather focused on the constructive elements that make for poor narrative writing. I attempted to synthesize multiple construction trends under the title of āquotabilityā and āgoing hardā and explained my reasoning for doing so. Arguments of disgust refers to people defining their beliefs along the lines of gut emotional impulses and treating feelings of revulsion like intuition and not simply feelings - "I feel uncomfortable when I see someone wearing a bondage harness in public, so this must be sexual harassment", "I love dogs and could never imagine eating their meat, people who do it must be monsters". Making an argument for technical deficiency in narrative writing is no more an argument of disgust/"cringe" than saying that a chair that falls apart when you sit on it is a poorly constructed chair. I don't even think making a taste-informed argument is necessarily "argument of cringe" unless you're claiming the book is Technically or ideologically bad just because you dislike it, without making an argument for its technical issues or message.
Say if someone just had a block of clay and said āIām going to have fun and just make whatever I feel likeā and they make a sculpture of a bird and share it, of course it would be cruel and elitist to sneer that their results donāt look like those of a master sculptor. Thatās not the point of the exercise, the point is to have fun and make art. Thereās no skill barrier for that, no right or wrong way to do things. But if someone sets out saying āIām going to make a pottery vessel which is symmetrical, is smooth and solid, holds fluid, and is safe to eat and drink from, and then sell it for that purposeā thereās tried and true techniques and materials and PRACTICE required to accomplish this goal. There are literal millennia that have gone into forming standard techniques for this process. If that person disregards all this to do whatever the hell they want and then presents a cracked uneven lump in the vague form of a cup for sale, they did not accomplish their stated goal, and it would be very appropriate to identify the errors in their process and give them suggestions for improvement. It is ābad potteryā by the standards set for it. When writing a narrative, youāre engaging with something much more fluid but ultimately similar, there are standards within your chosen literary tradition, and they can be met or failed.
Of course this isn't a perfect analogy since writing doesnāt have objective yes or no answers to its quality like a functional physical object does. Like you were describing, narrative writing is probably the most subjective form of storytelling there is, everything within the story exists only as words on a page and how they are interpreted in the reader's head. Every story exists only in interaction with the reader, as non-visual non-audio non-tactile media its experience is deeply subjective. It is impossible to make criticisms of the cumulative piece of literature that are entirely objective. But that doesnāt mean there is no way of measuring and arguing for the quality and effectiveness of writing within a specific craft, and there Are much more closer to objective ways to measure an authorās use of basic techniques like word choice, contrast, pacing, timing, etc, and to make very strong arguments for how they utilize tone, characterization, symbolism, and theme.
One of my all time favorite movies is Troll 2, itās in my top 20 on the exact same list as some movies acclaimed as seminal masterpieces by industry defining directors like Tarkovsky and Kurasawa. Troll 2 is a terrible film and is an absolute DELIGHT to watch, if the same basic thing was made competently Troll 2 would be nothing, and there is nothing āironicā to my enjoyment. A favorite is a favorite. But just because I adore it enough to put it on the same list as Stalker doesnāt mean that the entire study of film and its techniques is rendered irrelevant, and that there are no ways to qualitatively define and argue for what makes Stalker regarded as a masterpiece and Troll 2 regarded one of the worst movies ever made. Which is, I think, a film equivalent of what is suggested when people become defensive over criticism of technically poor narrative writing and fall back on "taste is subjective and it's not hurting anyone who cares have fun".
You can write whatever makes you happy. You can enjoy amateur writing that fails at its intended purpose, and you can be bored out of your mind with literature that is widely considered a masterpiece. All writing has value as creative expression, and I believe itās important to find a happy medium where we can both have literary criticism and not make people afraid to express themselves and write for fun just because itās not technically proficient. But I believe the common response that boils down to 'stop being judgmental let people have funā when people discuss improvement of craft within a storytelling convention is an anti-intellectual impulse. Itās at least subconsciously expressing that anyone who tries to apply theory and academic rigor to an artform is a snobbish elite, thereās really just nothing to the theory behind narrative writing, anyone can REALLY do anything the snobbish elite can and itās Good and beyond criticism because itās art and not hurting anyone and someone might enjoy it. It devalues the artform by defending it with suggestions that it can't and shouldn't be expected to be held up to any standards.
If your (general you) goal for writing is simply to have fun and you donāt care about improving your craft, then recognize that these discussions on theory do not apply to the act of Having Fun instead of getting defensive (and also donāt publish in places/contexts where literary criticism is part of the culture and a drive towards technical proficiency is expected). And on the other end, if you are pursuing improvement of your craft as a writer or engage in editing or literary scholarship, you have a responsibility to not descend onto an amateur/someone just having fun and criticize it like you would a published novel by an established author. But professionally published books have editors for a reason. Literature and writing is taught in schools and is an avenue of study for a reason. Group criticism is standard to every kind of art education for a reason. It is not to be mean, it's because these mediums are understood as difficult and important and deserving of this sort of rigor.
The thing is nobody at pride is evaluating you to determine if youāre queer enough to be there because theyāre too busy thinking āitās so hot outā and āwhy is this lemonade 12 dollars?ā
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relevant to that last post: iāve always wondered a bit about evan telling zoe that heāsĀ ānot going to cry and start breaking thingsā if she says sheās breaking up with him. the crying part is logical enough, especially since most evans cry quite a lot, but why reassure her that he wonāt break anything? is that just part of evanās mental picture of What People Do When They Get Dumped? has he seen people he knows break things when theyāre upset? has he previously done that himself, either accidentally or intentionally?
i think its because hes aware connor has done similar and scared zoe in the past. it is kind of odd though.
#on the other hand tho#i could imagine heidi doing that in her worst moments#and instilling it in evans mind
kkamikazed ,,consider: maybe his dad and heidi had a nasty breakup in which his dad mightāve Broke something :āD so he just assumes that thatās a Thing that happens sometimes
bisexual-evanhansen Iād assume because he knows (either from own experience or zoe telling him) that connor had a tendency to break things when upset, and he assumes thatās connor is zoeās main frame of reference for Upset Boy, so heās trying to reassure her
an explanation involving evanās dad had occurred to me but the others had not⦠ouch
just remembered 1) this post 2) this paragraph from the novel, after evan returns home from attending connorās wake
I crumple the note and stare at my wrongly dressed reflection in the mirror. Even if I had known that a suit was the thing to wear, I donāt own one. The last time I wore a suit was at my dadās wedding and that was a rental. My mom and I flew out to Colorado. She didnāt want to go to the wedding, but I did. I donāt know if she went just for me or if she also wanted to prove to my dad that she had moved on. She certainly didnāt prove it to me. When we got back to the hotel after the reception, she took the heel of her shoe and started hammering it into our picture-frame wedding favor until the carpet was covered with tiny pieces of glass. At the time I thought she just hated picture frames. I was only ten.
uh oh!
Girl whose most frequent mistake is inaction voice: wow I keep making mistakes I better not do anything
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