hi

do me a favor and reblog this and put in the tags what time it is for you and what you're currently doing/thinking about

i bring a "technically i could do this tomorrow" energy to things that tomorrow me really resents

sometimes i feel ive got to

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run away

May I please have 1 everything

Noah's Ark if every animal reproduced asexually

Interesting I like it

stupid fucking asteroid killed all the dinosaurs so that the planet went into the ice age and homo sapiens evolved from whatever the fuck and could invented glasses getting dirty

if Candice has a picture phone why did she never just take a photo of what phineas and ferb were doing and text it to her mom

if she did this doofenshmirtz would just be like you see perry the platypus i sold my old computer at the pawn shop but i forgot to delete all those embarrassing photos from the christmas party, which is why i’ve invented the pixel-replacinator! and then as candace is going to text her mom the photo the phone gets hit with the beam and she looks down and she’s just texted her mom a photo of doofenshmirtz in a sexy elf costume or smth. candace can never fucking win the universe bends to facilitate her psychological torment

disney channel heritage post

swifties always going on the "you just hate women" defense like first of all Taylor Swift is not a woman she's an unskippable ad

when you fuck her and she likes it #sex

everyone eat more vegetables NOW!!! and mention the last vegetable you ate in the tags so we're all on the buddy system. I'll start: bok choy

*puts my hand on your shoulder* Don’t worry, I have your back. We’re gonna turn this crisis into a crwaswas

I have already died thrice by 1pm

never kill yourself . your next apple could be so good it makes you feel like a horse

let's develop a perfect plan

1. get cozy in bed