... ... ... slimedogs

hello askdjaskd i am still looking over this account and just reminiscing (over sometimes not good things but aksdjaskd)... my oldest archived posts are from 2012... and i know for a fact that i actually had this account from before then, because i used to have stuff BEFORE 2012... but i bulked deleted a lot of stuff YEARS ago, because i wanted to... i wanted to have a zahhak homestuck themed blog and went thru and deleted a lot of "garbage" posts as i thought they were, because it was not homestuck zahhaks...

i don’t think i ever made original post of my own on tumblr. i used to just religiously reblog stuff on tumblr back when i was a teenager and into fandoms. i started college and stopped using tumblr, because i didn’t want to get distracted from my studies by it (b/c i would spend A LOT of time on tumblr)... so i do not know why i am now making a post on tumblr after years of ignoring it, and also years prior to that of being too anxious/nervous/awkward to use it. 

it’s 4am, i am just Speaking Now, so... 

i left before a lot of major milestones tumblr hit: like getting rid of its spicy content for example aksjd. i am sure there was also a whole lot of other stuff i missed out on as well, because while i haven’t been active on tumblr, i at least heard news of what’s been going on with it. i just can’t think of it off of the top of my head, lol. i know a lot of people migrated over to twitter.

i do not use twitter, because i grew up on tumblr essentially (started using it when i was, like, 12/13? didn’t stop using it until i was 18/19). using tumblr during my formative years was rough, and after i stopped using tumblr i, like, physically felt my mindset and attitudes changing to be a bit less... like, hyper-radical? i wasn’t as angry all the time, i wasn’t as anxious to get back to the computer all the time, in fact -- i became pretty productive (not now... right now covid has me perishing (though i did finally get my vaccine)). anyways, the point i’m trying to make is that: if i survived through tumblr circa 2014 during its peak No Brain Cells, People Have Never Been Outside & Touched the Grass phase, then i’ve decided that i do not want to relive that phase over on twitter, lol. i like to think i’ve matured a bit, and become less... hypersensitive? as reddit neckbeardy as that sounds.

i’ve definitely changed a lot of my viewpoints, become a bit more realistic, and i try not to be as bothered by little/inconsequential things anymore. i’m sure i will be in for a world of cringe if i go through and look at all of the old stuff on my blog. i am very tempted to see if there is a way for me to nuke its contents, because i don’t think i’d agree with many of the viewpoints on it anymore -- at least not to, like, the radical extent that i once did. signing off this blue hell sort of grounded me to reality and let me see the grey area of life.

i’m not sure who out of everyone i watch is still active, or what followers i have are still active (i only ever made it to ~400 followers, lol. i remember wanting to be tumblr famous so bad as a 16 yr old asdkjaskdjasd). i’m not sure what the general vibe and demographic and energy of tumblr is these days. back when i left, it was sort of bleeding users, but not as much as what i’m assuming it has at this point with other social media replacing it. 

i’m not really sure why i am making this post... i think i just felt nostalgic for what was once a very big part of my life. i’ve been thinking of coming back to tumblr, because i’ve been told by some discord friends that it has sort of mellowed out. everyone that was a mouth frother sort of went on over to twitter to discourse about things that don’t matter. i’m not into fandoms or anything like that, though i’m still into things like RP, drawing, writing, etc...

i think... now that i am a more well adjusted adult i want to use my account again, because i sort of miss the comedy/humor of tumblr. again -- i do not know who is even reading this if anyone at all, and i never had any friends on tumblr, really... but if you have read this then hello! i am rambling! i’ve missed this blue hellscape to an extent! 

maybe if you want?? suggest some people for me to follow down below? if you’re still an active watcher say hi? i don’t know! i have said a lot of words here just now. never in the past did i ever feel the need to actively engage with this website, but i thought it would be sort of funny if i came back and just started to reblog like normal. just clocking back in, lol.