Welcome to the hit game show... Can You ADULT?

"It would have been easier if you'd just said yes."

They’re in the same order as hummingbirds and, in some positions, you can see the resemblance

But like… a hummingbird that’s cosplaying as a falcon.

Sleek. Efficient. Aerodynamic. Perfectly optimized.

Also they like to sleep in chimneys, hence the name, and when they perch they become very very flat

They also like to sleep in groups

Anyway 10/10 weird little beast. Love these little flat fuck hummingbird falcons

"Copy. Moon joy."

"I have two Microsoft Outlooks, and neither one of those are working."

"Houston, if you could give me about 20 new superlatives in the mission summary for tomorrow that will help out my vocabulary a little bit, that would be great. Thank you."

“If you’ve ever seen the top of the spotlight of the top of the Luxor at night in Vegas, this looks like what it wants to be when it grows up.”

"To all of you down there on Earth... we love you, from the moon."

"We just went sci fi."

"It is so great to see Earth again. To Asia, Africa, and Oceania: we are looking back at you. We hear you can look up and see the moon right now. We see you too."

"We will always choose Earth. We will always choose each other."

“It’s a bright spot on the moon, and we would like to call it Carroll.”

"Amaze amaze amaze."

"I said that we do not leave Earth, but we choose it. And that is true."

"Christina has been sleeping head down in the middle of the vehicle, kind of like a bat"

"It's really fun to be floatin' around, it just makes me feel like a little kid."

"Trust us, you look amazing, you look beautiful."

"'Homo Sapiens' is all of us, no matter where you're from or what you look like. We're all one people."

"I'm proud to call myself the Space Plumber."

"We were all eagerly awaiting the chorus."

"Copy heart. Copy bracelet."

“Welcome back. We are still here. They are in space.”

"Copy. Bubble wrap nominal."

"We have rediscovered the chocolate snacks."

of course there are a ton of other fics (mostly old ones when i got my account online for the first time) but i need to dig more into the memory… here's the first list of all the amazing works and people on here <3

by knowledgeableknitter

🎀 matchmaker steve

🎀 isn't it obvious?

🎀 valentine's day disaster

by sassandscribbles

🎀 crimes against curls

🎀 the quiet between us

🎀 the time when i drundenly wrote letters to my boss…

🎀 bucky barnes who knows he's cute

🎀 meet me in the shadows

🎀 midnight rain

by definitelynotaginger

🎀 a series of fortunate events

🎀 nanny dutties

by harveystan

🎀 and the world somehow shifted

🎀 a lot of work

🎀 not enought right now

🎀 safe

by emmathefanficgal

🎀 and yet

by multiversefanfics

🎀 patch you up

by buckybarnes82

🎀 four eyes and juicy thighs

by buckytakethewheel

🎀 heavy in your arms

by moonstoneandmoonlight

🎀 the waitress

by buckysgirlll

🎀 mob!bucky takes care of his sick!gf

by pinksplace

🎀 stand up guy

by societyfolklore

🎀 being nice

by brunchable

🎀 i suck at valentine's day

by quantumbarnes

🎀 james buchanan "boob guy" barnes

by sleepy-k0y

🎀 weird pastime, but ok

claire tablizo: i've never made banana bread before but i KNOW it shouldn't look like that

comments:

lex: hey so like. what the hell happened.

susannah: is the banana bread in the room with us

bone pharaoh: look on the bright side! you still get to bake banana bread for the first time!

andy: how is it wet AND burnt???

eggo: i fear you created a new element

[email protected]: so close! you actually need flour and not crude oil!

honda_accord_xgen: concepts of banana bread

keekswinds: did you forget everything but the sugar

owlbearzz: always make banana bread every 2000 miles

NFLstuff: all that's missing is the banana bread

vonzuben: archeologists finding evidence of banana bread at pompeii

redorkulessrex: is it under the sauce?

mzahradnicek: hey babe i think you still haven't made banana bread maybe

avg pomappreciater: making this seems harder than making banana bread

catherine: queen i wouldn't know how to recreate that outcome if i tried

maxine: do you do weddings??

]_[🐑

]🐑[

][

FUCK HARD

FUCK FAST

FUCK BADLY

NEVER USE GENERATIVE AI

CREATE JOY

MUSIC ALWAYS

PSPSPSPS AT KITTIES ON THE STREET

YUMMY SOUP

go see the doctor about that thing

BE TRANSGENDER

KISS YOUR FRIENDS

EAT CHEESE

NEVER KILL YOURSELF

instead, all her brainspace spent on that song would be replaced with the vivid memories of roman gladiator, taylaurius velox. she's able to hide this at first, but her music begins to take on a gradually romaner and romaner tint. at first, people are like "damn, she's getting REALLY conservative, huh" and other people are like "wow, she's so deep, she knows what a rubicon is" but eventually travis kelce leaves her out of nowhere (he wasn't sure if dating someone possessed by a roman gladiator made him gay or not and anyway he was getting sick of being like "we're going to play the lions" and taylor being like "LIONS? WHERE?") and taylor publishes an entire brutus themed album about this betrayal and it's beginning to weird people out

and so eventually travis kelce is getting like, bomb threats sent to his family for leaving taylor and eventually he's like "okay, okay, i left her because she kept having all these vivid nightmares of gladatorial combat and she kept saying that football was giving her the ick because we never actually killed anybody for the glory of rome" and then he just gets more bomb threats because he left a struggling woman during a mental health crisis

and eventually taylor is writing music about her forbidden roman senator lover and her fanbase is either whittled WAY down or WAY up because people want to watch this trainwreck happen (or maybe she influences culture so hard that we're just all really into rome now) but she's being super cagey about the name of this roman senator. until. and now here's the twist:

weird al has been getting all of the same vivid memories of taylaurius velox. and he still has all his memories of her old songs. so he's writing all these detailed song parodies of taylor swift songs that don't exist anymore including specific details about their shared gladiatorial reality that taylor has never shared with anybody else. including that her lover's name was publius, and she's been calling him Poob for short

at this point a lot of original swifties are leaving. they could do the brutus stuff, but they really can't survive poob. taylor makes a clapping back at the haters song including the lyric "these bitches don't know publius" and it ends up all over all sorts of merch. there's a renewed archaeological interest in roman gladatorial combat

most importantly, the internet discourse is the best it's ever been. does this make taylor swift transmasc? is travis kelce problematic for leaving his fiancee while she gradually morphs into a roman gladiator? is this good queer representation? if taylaurius velox was a gay man, does that mean the gaylors were technically correct? is weird al morally wrong for capitalizing off of her music if she cant remember it anymore? was weird al sent by god to torment taylor swift?