half paying attention and the 7-11 cashier was pronouncing 12 dollars as "two elf dollars" and I kept saying "what?"

6 us dollars = 1 elf dollar

I was curious if the exchange rate has gotten worse so I did a quick search for elf inflation and

cats have access to keyboard shortcuts we can barely comprehend

imposter syndrome is so funny like fuuuuck i hope nobody finds out im tricking people into thinking im competent by knowing things and doing them

ughh. why does my head hurt

little gay ppl in my phone you’re in my pocket rn next to my boner

salad is mostly items

fired as a porn producer AGAIN for suggesting a passion of the christ porn parody AGAIN

the ghost of my dead brother: it would be my turn on computer... if I wasn't aborted... me: fuck off dude you died in a car crash everyone saw it

Mr. Fitzwilliam Darcy being like, "I am 100% committed to respecting your 'no', but I heard you wouldn't promise my aunt not to marry me so I had to come and check just one (1) more time."

I hate how on Tumblr, a username like lisa486 is almost certainly a pornblot, while someone named solidsnakesasscheeks is almost certainly a real person

I could be a porn bot if I wanted to

yeah joe mama is fun and all, but have y’all ever heard about a henway?

what’s a henway?