Je ne sais pas

65° Vermont

Me: you will not earn what you desire by banging the cabinet door.

My cat: This is a test of wills, is it not? We shall see if your ability to put up with my incessant banging outlasts my eternal lust for snackie treats. Years of conditioning have hardened me for this purpose. bang bang bang

Me: ksst!

My cat, throwing herself to the ground like she's been shot: Oh! Oh I have been assailed in my own home! Have mercy, have pity! Surely in the cruel darkness of your heart there is some mote of goodness that might stay your hand! Do not strike me, I pray you!

Me: ok

‘Capataz’ = ‘foreman’.

Der Postillon, Germany’s equivalent to The Onion, reporting on the election:

Is this the turning point? Trump wins important state New Michivada he just made up.

“Oh shit!”: Putin totally forgot to manipulate the US election.

Not that as well! Half-blind 100-year-old man who counts all the votes alone died of old age.

Experts uncertain if Trump wil win today or after the civil war

“If I can’t have it, nobody will” - Trump sets White House on fire

Sarah McBride became the US’s first openly trans state senator and the country’s highest ranking openly trans legislator, as well as Delaware’s first out LGBTQ+ person elected to the state’s legislature.

Mondaire Jones and Ritchie Torres, both in New York, became the firstly openly gay Black men elected to Congress.

Cori Bush became the first Black woman elected to Congress in Missouri’s history. She is a community organizer and activist who became involved with politics after Ferguson.

Iman Jodeh, the daughter of Palestinian immigrants, became Colorado’s first Muslim lawmaker.

Shevrin Jones became the first out LGBTQ+ person to be elected to Florida’s state senate.

Michele Rayner-Goolsby became the first openly queer Black woman elected to the Florida House of Representatives.

Jabari Brisport became New York’s first openly queer state senator of color.

Kim Jackson became Georgia’s first openly LGBTQ+ state senator, and Torrey Harris became the first out LGBTQ+ member of Tennessee’s state legislature.

Taylor Small became the first openly trans member of the Vermont State Legislature.

Stephanie Byers became the first openly trans lawmaker ever elected in Kansas and the first trans person of Native American heritage ever elected to any state legislature. She’s a member of the Chikasaw Nation.