Then he’s kinda spooked and shuts it down. Anyway let’s say a little while later he’s going through a touch period- no lined up fights and he’s feeling like he’s gonna buzz out of his skin and he sees this advertisement for the sex party and the club is so high end and has a 15 page privacy statement and no phone and NDAs and like ok somehow Shane is like- there. He just is. And he’s not even sure what for he just, needed to know. Needed to see maybe. Needs to figure out why it gives his pulling feeling in his chest his abdomen when he reads about it or thinks about it. And anyway so there is nervous virgin Shane Hollander at a sex party ?? And he’s like what the fuck as I doing! But then a nice guy approaches him and they chat a bit and Shane has a beer and the guy is well he’s handsome and nice to Shane and Shane is meant to be figuring stuff out right?

So then they are kissing and it’s good and Shane is freaking out a bit in his head but it is good. Anyway the guy leads Shane into another room- the play room and then they are on a couch and making out and Shane is like ok cool I’m like this is good right? And he doesn’t really know what to do with himself or ask for what he wants but the guy is a good kisser and then he’s gripping at Shane’s face and a hand on the front of neck and Shane’s scalp goes a little tingly and oh that’s nice. Anyway the guy is being gentle and careful with Shane because Shane is like physically obviously anxious and Shane blinks his eyes open as the guy starts kissing at his neck and his eyes scan the room, people all around them in various states of hooking up, fucking, undress and Shane is like oh my god what am I doing but also ? Maybe I like some of this.

Poor overthinker is overthinking. Like what was he thinking- he could have tried just find a guy on an app or something but he’s always kinda done all or nothing and then Shane sees him. A tall broad man with a thick mess of dark curls and big hands and there’s a girl with her head in his lap and she’s not- she’s not giving him head but it almost looks like it, the guys pants are on but her face is all over him, nuzzling and he’s stroking her hair and face and mouth and Shane is like. Dizzy. He feels a wave of hit crack open in his chest he’s never ever felt before and fuck. He can’t look away, his mouth goes dry and his heart hammers and this guy is speaking down to her, his eyes kind but he’s tutting his lips or smirking when he pulls her back from him and she wines and Shane is like. I’m gonna die ? He is so locked into them and he can’t even think he’s just breathing and then, then the guy looks up at him and oh. Shane can’t even pretend to look away, his eyes are heavy and this guy is still kissing and licking over his neck and ear and Shane is fixated on this guy, who is looking at him and gives him a small smirk, licks his lips and watches Shane back.

Oh.

Shane feels that pull pull in his stomach, but now it’s towards this guy. He wants. He swallows and pulled back into kisses for a few moments and he tries to focus but he finds himself pulling away, frowning a bit as the guy he’s with goes about kissing over his neck and chest again, hand rubbing over Shane’s body gently and Shane’s eyes are greedy, right back to the pair and the guy has his hand wound tight in her hair and her hands held to her chest in his other hand as she continues to try get to his cock through jeans and Shane. Shane wants that. He’s so sure of it a hot aching true rush he needs that. Fuck.

The guy is staring back at him again, chest rising and falling with big even breaths and Shane lets his eyes scan him, unable to help himself and the guy quirks an eyebrow at Shane and Shane just nods, he doesn’t know what he’s nodding too but the only word in his brain is yes. He wants. The guy on him slides a hand down over his cock and he’s hard and Shane gasps but then he’s pulling back and making an excuse to slip to the bathroom and just “needs a break” and the guy is lovely and kind and all yeah no worries. Shane cools himself down splashes water on his face and is sooo fucking resolved on going home. He’s horny and confused and dizzy and it’s been enough figuring out for one night. (He’s gonna go home and come so hard to the thought of curly haired guy. Fuck)

Shane is walking down the hall from the bathroom and stumbled because oh. Curly hair is there, leant on a wall and thumbing at his phone and Shane feels like- disappointment for the girl who Cleary didn’t get what she wanted from him if he’s here now. Shane goes to just walk past him, totally cool but then a soft warm accented voice. “Hi, I’m Ilya” and Shane is turning around and chewing at his lip and fuck fuck this guy is so.god.

“Oh. Shane. I’m Shane” Shane says without swallowing his tongue somehow? And Ilya just nods and he takes a small step closer, is shoving his phone in his pocket.

“Already leaving?” Ilya asks and Shane shrugs, nods, shrugs, shoves his hands in his pockets. “Oh uh yeah I don’t think, you know think I got what I needed” and what the fuck Shane is cringing at himself because what did that even man and this man is so hot and there is so much eye contact. Ilya takes a few small steps closer and brushes his fingers at Shane’s wrist and says.

“Are you sure?” And oh. Shane swallows and meets his eyes and the back of his neck tingles and his hips throb and he wants so fucking horribly it makes the world tip.

“I uh” Shane doesn’t have answer.

“I think maybe he couldn’t give you what you needed Shane. But, doesn’t meant someone can’t” Ilya says and Shane is nodding again, without realising. Fuck.

“Yeah?” He asks because he literally has maybe 4 words that exist in his brain right now and that was the only passable one.

“Yeah” Ilya repeats and his hand is on Shane’s cheek, gentle and soft, barely there and Shane is leaning into it, breathing out hard.

Fuck.

Yeah.

Shane feels himself sway in, in his pulse in his throat and mouth and Ilya smells good and his hand is tough and big and such a gentle grip on Shane’s face but with a strength under it that makes Shane wanna sink- down- be smaller somehow and then- then his phone rings in his pocket and he’s jumping back, pulling it out of his pocket to see ‘mum’ and her face and it’s probably about that brand deal he emailed her last night and Shane is in a fucking sex club ???? Oh my god.

“I gotta- I gotta um. Go I yeah. Sorry.” And Shane is high tailing it out of there.