Accio Obsessions

boycotts deprive the target of money.

not voting does not deprive the government of money.

it does, however, deprive you of power.

those prying eyes don’t see the way henry gently coaxes alex to bed during finals weeks and cram nights, a soft hand on his broad shoulders as he saves the word doc alex has been fretting over for the last couple hours. alex will murmur and whine and insist on continuing- “just another hour or two, hen,” he’ll beg, curls mused from where he’s been running his hand through his hair throughout the night. henry is always persistent, regardless.

he’ll bring alex to his feet and lead him to their bedroom, all 6 ft of him, hoodie-clad and glasses slipping down the bridge of his nose as he grumbles about spreadsheets into henry’s shoulder. henry will smile and nod and kiss at alex’s forehead as he does.

when they get there, he’ll slip alex’s glasses from his nose and onto the nightstand as the man sways infront of him, the newfound lack of blue light reminding his body of how tired he is. henry will shimmy his sweats off so alex doesn’t wake up in the middle of the night, tangled in the comforter and henry himself, overheated. he’ll let alex lean into him for a moment as he pets across the back of his head, smoothing over stray curls and soothing him further.

they’ll get into bed eventually, with henry tucking alex in and letting him roll over under the blankets to pillow his head on henry’s chest. henry will stifle a tiny laugh over how alex’s hair tickles his neck, and alex will be dead asleep in the next few minutes. Henry will follow suit eventually.

Henry is in enough shadow to mask his expression somewhat, but can we just talk about his little smile as he leans in?

first things first: my boys are so touchy & affectionate with each other & it's the cutest, most adorable thing on planet earth.

i die.

moving on...

sweet alex, he’s all heart. prattling along, just as happy as he can be. 

it’s integral to watch our sunshine boy in this scene. 

the book & film are both from alex’s perspective, but there’s one thing that we’re afforded between the pages that doesn’t fully make it on screen — his emotional & cognitive layers. & that’s not anybody’s fault & it doesn’t make the film any less incredible, that’s just how adaptations occur sometimes. you can’t translate everything on screen & honestly, that’s the way it should be. some things can just stay in the written story.

tzp did a marvelous job of pulling some of those pieces from the story & threading them into alex’s movements, expressions, & actions. he gave us everything that he could & he did it phenomenally. i can’t imagine anyone else being our alex. i can’t get over how perfectly he was casted.

all this to reiterate, it’s so key to watch alex here.

we get to see some of his layers. he goes from playful, to pensive, to deeply sincere — “i’ve never felt this way about anyone” — & from there, he shifts into an incredibly exposed emotional space & you see him gather himself, working through his words & trying to share his heart in the most fluent way he can.

“it’s like there’s a rope attached to my chest & it keeps pulling me towards you.”

there’s never been a moment in his life where can’t share exactly how he feels. he’s always been free to do so. for alex, there was never a question about if he’d tell henry, the question was what he’d tell henry, & once he solved the what, he could proceed with the when. 

his mom asked if he felt ‘forever’ about henry & he didn’t consciously know at the time. (i’m a firm believer in the fact that they’ve been in love all along but that’s not the topic right now.) he watches henry in the bar & that’s where he figures it out. the next step is to tell him. point a to b. no detours. 

“& it feels so right”

all heart, all the time. our sunshine boy.

i don’t see fear here, i rarely do in alex, but i do see timidity. so with our eyes on him in this scene, we watch him waffle through his words, barreling toward the inevitable.

he stays in physical contact with henry the entire time — running his hands along his forearm, tangling their fingers together, tracing circles on henry’s wrist & back. i think he needs it here just as much as he wants it.

the most that alex has ever discovered & understood about himself has been through touching henry. he knows himself best when he’s skin-to-skin with the man he loves.

this moment cannot be any different.

—- “what i mean to say is, henry, i—“ 

i’d give anything to hear it come out of his mouth fully here. i want to know how it sounds under the texas sun — someplace as bright & warm as he is.

alex has never had to fear his own heart; even in the moments where he wasn't sure where it was going. after the NYE kiss, he went to nora to grapple with his feelings & he tried to talk to henry about it, but he never, ever shied away from how he felt. he wasn't raised to. following that giant, gorgeous heart is in his nature. he's always been encouraged to be exactly who he is.

the same cannot be said for our prince.

our mythic, beautiful boy. he literally looks like he's crumbling here. mournful, finite cracks in his glistening, alabaster stone. an absolute masterpiece withered by expectation, tainted legacies, hopeless hopes, & crippling fears.

he has to shy away. he doesn't believe or even entertain the idea that he might have a choice. to be so in love, but so trapped that your love can tangle its roots into the earth, but never bloom.

distance & longing take up far too much space in those stunning hazel eyes. it's all too much for him here. no fight or fawn, just freeze and flight. he did it all in expression: from pure bliss, to the dawn of fear, to desperate wanting, to heartbreak, to retreat. (nicholas galitzine, you wonderfully gifted creature)

in our prince’s head, it doesn’t matter how bad he wants to hear the words. it doesn’t matter if he’s loved alex & wanted alex all this time. his heart — their hearts — are of no consequence to the trajectory of their lives. & so, despite all this time; despite everything that’s passed between them in the past year — the firsts & the tender moments, the texts, calls, & emails, the falling in love — henry does the one thing he’s always had to do, lock himself up & run away. just like he did on new year’s eve.

alex has spent a year working him loose; making him feel as free & loved & authentic as he possibly can. he’s kneaded every tight curve, massaged every tensioned inch. & henry has put in the same amount of work learning to allow himself to be cared for. for someone to see his bright places, his passions, his wittiness, tenacity, & sparks.

our boys have grown so much & yet sadly, in a moment, terror bends henry back into an ill -fitting place.

the progress isn’t lost, just tucked away. fear is one hell of a keeper.

& you see him dressed up again in his suit. ramrod straight, prim & proper, the closed-off prince of england’s hearts that climbed out of his car to meet alex at kensington a year ago. a man of few words & little feeling. because there’s too much risk in feeling. feeling leads you to a dock in the middle of the lake in texas, listening to the man you love willing & ready to love you back, but you can’t be overjoyed — because you’re terrified.

Weighing in on yet another round of “fan spaces are youth spaces” (aka “go home and knit, old lady” or “You’re old enough to be my/someone’s mom! gross!” )

Consider these thoughts:

There’s a whole set of interests and behaviors that you might become interested in as you grow from child to adolescent to young adult and take greater interest in the wider world.

You might like horses, or dolls.  Or building models.  You might play soccer, or follow baseball every summer and learn about  box scores.   You might follow the college football draft, or love a pop band.  You might deeply admire a rock band and learn to play the guitar.  You might love superheroes and see all their movies.  You might love space opera and collect paperback books.  Maybe you collect trading cards of your favorite team players – or movie moments.  You probably get t-shirts and posters of teams, or media outlets.  You might get deeply into a social or political cause.

Those are all expressions of interest in the world, all with associated social aspects, many with associated creative actions. 

And then you get older.  And here’s the thing about that list.  The things on that list that are “for boys?”   Are also “for men.”   But the things on that list that are “for girls” or “for nerds?” Are only “for children.”  

Adult men wear brightly colored team clothing and paint their faces without shame.   They join fantasy football leagues and hang out online.   They follow Phish (or continuously talk about how they did when that was a thing).  They spend vast sums on tickets to bowl games.   They get excited all over the internet about Geddy Lee’s greatest hits.  They spend long afternoons on the golf course, playing very bad golf.

No one tells them to grow up 

An adult woman who turns a childhood dollhouse into a beautiful scale model of a real Victorian home is “eccentric.”  An adult man who builds a vast HO train layout in his basement is a “train enthusiast.”   An adult woman who displays her favorite Bryer horses is “odd,” an adult man with a shelf of signed baseballs is “a collector” or even “an investor.” 

Adult women making fanart of attractive movie stars is “creepy,’ while adult men decorating their garages with calendar art of scantily-clad very-young women is “just what guys do.”

Interests and hobbies that were feminine and are taken up by men become acceptable.   When The Beatles were greeted with mobs of fainting teen girls, they were a “boy band.”  When young men discovered them, they became Serious Musicians.  

Over and over, across fields of interest, things that girls like are “toys and games and childish” and should be left behind by adults, while things that boys like are “hobbies and sports” that are lifetime pastimes.  And acceptable “hobbies” for adult women?   Most are things that could be coded as household chores, but generations of women have worked to turn into enjoyable pastimes:  knitting, sewing, quilting.  Home decor.  Baking.   Many adult women (myself included) enjoy doing those things in their free time and have elevated them to art forms.  But that doesn’t change the fact that they’re rooted in utility, while “men’s hobbies” are, by and large, rooted in leisure.

I was approaching a 90s concept of middle age (my late 20s) when I really came into fandom. At the time, it was my first interaction with women my mother’s age who were definitely not my mother or her friends. In some respects, fandom offered the most level playing field I’d ever been on, and my fandom community was almost 100% women. And, by and large, with some super rad exceptions, it remains that way (both cis and trans, straight and queer). But at the time, this was a new experience for me. 

I also really found online fandom in my 20s, in the 90s. And yeah, it was multigenerational and full of the most fabulous storytellers. It was where I learned that other people were buzzing with inner narration, with headcanons and AUs and fix-its. That other people mentally wrote missing scenes and better endings in the shower and came up with extended worldbuilding during boring meetings. That people are full of stories and that there were places to share them.

In the Little Mermaid 2023 remake, they changed the setting of the story.

Despite what many believe, the original 1989 animated movie wasn't set in Denmark. Judging by the architecture of Prince Eric's castle, the animals present during Kiss the Girl, and the landscape of the land itself, the movie is set in the European Mediterranean. Disney all but confirmed this in latter years. There were actual theories about Eric's kingdom being in Italy.

In the remake, Eric's kingdom is an island heavily implied to be on the Caribbean sea.

Eric is adopted and his mother, the Queen is super alive in this, and she is black. Grimsby here is portrayed by a Pakistani-British actor, making him ambiguously brown. Carlotta was replaced by a character named Lashana, and she is portrayed by a Trinidadian actress.

The island population is super diverse, with black and brown people everywhere.

They have a tropical climate and the only trees seen are palm trees.

Instead of waltzing when they visit the kingdom, Ariel and Eric dance Caribbean music.

When Eric shows several maps to Ariel, he suspiciously cites the names of a lot of South America countries, like Venezuela and Colombia, implying that the kingdom is closer to these countries than it is to Europe. He even cites my country, Brazil, referred as the Brazilian Empire, which dates the movie from anywhere between 1822 and 1889, when Brazil was indeed an Empire.