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Please Don’t Call
in case you want to say anything but can’t call or send it to the intended recipient, you can write it here

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Kevin Cummins, 'Justine Frischmann of 'Elastica' 'Art is either plagiarism or revolution - or both'
Feminists might kill joy simply by not finding the objects that promise happiness to be quite so promising. The word feminism is thus saturated with unhappiness. Feminists by declaring themselves as feminists are already read as destroying something that is thought of by others not only as being good but as the cause of happiness. The feminist killjoy “spoils” the happiness of others; she is a spoilsport because she refuses to convene, to assemble, or to meet up over happiness.
Does the feminist kill other people’s joy by pointing out moments of sexism? Or does she expose the bad feelings that get hidden, displaced, or negated under public signs of joy?
Does bad feeling enter the room when somebody expresses anger about things, or could anger be the moment when the bad feelings that circulate through objects get brought to the surface in a certain way?
Feminists do kill joy in a certain sense: they disturb the very fantasy that happiness can be found in certain places. To kill a fantasy can still kill a feeling. It is not just that feminists might not be happily affected by the objects that are supposed to cause happiness but that their failure to be happy is read as sabotaging the happiness of others.
The Promise of Happiness by Sara Ahmed
Oh easy mistake. Yearning actually rises from the floor and longing hangs from the ceiling
Han Kang, from We Do Not Part

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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I think Shirley Jackson delves so well into the horror of self-consciousness. To be so aware of yourself, whether due to loneliness or not belonging or abuse, can be a monstrous experience that reduces your experience of the world to a series of mechanical processes. I will get up. I will cross the room in front of everyone. I will get a cup of water. I must drink the cup of water before I return in case it is odd to have it on the couch. They must not think I'm odd. Instead of swinging into the kitchen for a drink while laughing with friends. Mechanical processes are based on cause and effect, and if you are so used to thinking in terms of cause and effect, you can start applying that framework nonsensically out of a self-defensive need for control--which begs the question of what happens when defense becomes offense
“ask me about” button PNGs credit not necessary but appreciated!
“denied the catharsis of punishment” is an underappreciated but hugely effective narrative consequence imo
#it’s so tasty and it comes in so many flavors#does the character self-loathe and feel anguished by what others intended as an act of forgiveness and grace?#does the character know they need to change but sort of madly wish they could trade the unceasing exhausting improvement journey#for a flash bang of slate-clearing repentance so they don’t have to *think* about it anymore?#is is a creeping horror as the character realizes no one is going to punish them because everyone else still thinks what they did was okay?#does the character have to live the rest of their life just feeling ever so slightly untrusted by everyone with no way to stop it?#sorry for leaving pretentious tags on tumblr dot com it will happen again
Peer-reviewed tags by @annabelle–cane
the way this is genuinely life changing stuff for me
Tell me about the dream where we pull bodies out of the lake / and dress them in warm clothes again.
bbc merlin: diamond of the day: part 2 // angels in america, tony kushner // kokomo, victoria hannan // bbc merlin: behind the scenes // the ghost on the shore, lord huron // leaving port, ingeborg bachmann (tr. mark anderson) // scheherazade, richard siken

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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“besides, I have a sister.” top contender for one liner that makes me so emotional
i can’t explain why that last sentence always feels like a punch to the gut but if you get it, you get it
The poet exists in fragments, so does the poetry.
Mary Oliver in “Dog Songs”
Taking Care Callista Buchen

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Joan Didion, writing about the shock that followed after the death of her husband, John.
Sylvia Plath, from "Three Women: A Poem for Three Voices" in The Collected Poems of Sylvia Plath