I'm wanting to erase myself. To scrub myself from time and space and memory. Let the world heal itself around the little scar I've left. And part of me keeps wondering if that will hurt people. If they'll be shocked. Say things like they "never saw it coming" because they never actually knew me. Or if they'll be mad about the mess I leave. If they'll take it personally. But this little vindictive part of me is saying, "good." Good. Every choice I make is based on what other people want. Let them be disappointed. All of the things they wanted from me, all the things they expected of me, they won't get. I won't be able to give it to them. There will be no satisfaction, no resolution. Just a tiny little me-shaped hole left in the universe that everyone will soon fill and forget. Poof. Gone. Just like that. And then I wonder if anyone will notice. If anyone will find me. When. How long. That kind of thing. Just please do me one favor if someday you find I'm not here anymore. Delete everything. Don't let people milk sympathy and attention from me.

















