Good morning all. I should be working, but I'm not. I meant to even though the last 5 or so days haven't been the best. I have lived with chronic sinus infections for years and years now, and I had surgery on Dec 31, 2020...way to start the New Year! It's still been a struggle. I've started developing pain in my face starting at my jaw and shooting through my cheek. It's not the kind of pain where anything OTC was working on so I spent the afternoon in the ER to get shots, not only for pain but steroids. I had been to the dentist on Wednesday for a cleaning and yearly x-rays which showed that my sinus cavity is once again full of fluid but expressed concern about pressure on my facial nerve. I go back to my ENT today hoping to find some answers. But you know? There may not be any. Tis true. Is it what I want? No. But it is something I may have to accept and live with. That. Is. Hard. These last few months, living with post COVID syndrome, living in an unknown has taken a toll. This photo right here is how I am getting through. Prayer, using my prayer journal, writing down Bible verses, following positive and godly people on social media, watching sermons on YouTube... I find myself in a time where I am hungry. Hungry for God, for truth, for peace and comfort. Normally, I would probably turn on the TV and sleep the pain away. It's far too easy to do that. I think my time is better used this way. It helps keep me from falling into the pit of why. Why do I catch every contagious little bug? Why is it that once I get one thing in my body under control, something else pops up? I'm really starting to understand that why doesn't matter. It's how I respond. Being chronically ill? It's hard, not just on your body, but on your mind, on your spirit, on your soul. It's hard to stay positive, to stay faithful, to be encouraging when you feel like crap so much of the time. This is me trying to be better. Not perfect, but better. And it's all I can do. I still hope and pray that one of these days I'll have more than one or two days where I feel healthy and strong, a week would be amazing. But... It may not happen. I just have to get out of the "why's", muddle on and keep going https://www.instagram.com/p/CPIr2AMrC35/?utm_medium=tumblr