he's in mombasa

sorry i am in fact a fan of when nhl guys sit down with shorts (that are already probably kindof short) and their massive thighs make them ride up and then they also manspread like crazy so now the shorts seem like micro shorts and thus in their effort to show masculinity they end up whoring themselves out

they need to stop making hockey romance tv shows theres already a hockey romance tv show its been going for 74 years and its called the national hockey league its really bad dont watch it

developing the hots for ryan gosling because of project hail mary is so fucking embarrassing I swear to god. that is a conventionally attractive man. a noted hollywood heartthrob. he's even blond, are you kidding me? did he win people magazine's sexiest man alive? I don't know. I'm not going to check but it wouldn't surprise me at this point. it's such a mainstream taste. such a clichéd celebrity crush. like oh I fancy ryan gosling and my favourite drink is coca-cola and my favourite snack is ready salted crisps. jesus christ. 'b-b-but i only like him when he's in a science pun tshirt and playing a dorky-awkward loner type!' doesn't matter. he's still ryan 'ken from barbie' gosling. it's so trite. I feel like the weird nerd girl in a teen coming-of-age romcom falling for the super popular jock. don't I know that I have a reputation to uphold here? cringe.

do you guys remember having hopes and dreams

ok idk why this is breaking containment but to be clear this post is about Game 3 of the 2026 Stanley Cup Western Conference Finals where the Colorado Avalanche were up 3-0 against the Vegas Golden Knights after the first period and then managed to lose the game 3-5. I do see how it could be interpreted as being about the general disillusionment of adulthood but I was actually talking about ice hockey

your world is dying. your husband presumably dies in space so now you're a widow and your world is still dying. then 50-ish years later your husband everyone assumed was dead pulls up in a random spaceship full of a highly volatile atmosphere with the solution to your impending apocalypse and none of the original crew from his mission and instead with a wet, blobby alien that he pack bonded with and almost died for and is now emotionally codependent on that now wont stop complaining about the temperature of the water in its enclosure. your name is adrian and you dont know how you got here

you are not a diva. you are a disrespectful twink with subpar vibes.

who’s lando

no i dont think women starving themselves and reconstructing their entire faces with makeup and plastic surgery is feminism and female empowerment

do you think mack will take will's last name and become macklin celebrini hockey when they get married

Interviews with hockey players are fantastic, because it is a complex game that can be spoken about at length, but during the intermission they'll find the Wettest player imaginable on the losing team and for thirty seconds they'll ask them things like "what do you need to do to get more pucks in the net?" And the player (panting, haunted behind the eyes) says something like "well, we've got to get them in there"