Auxilium Meum a Domino

Werther and Lotte, Goethe’s The Sorrows of Young Werther Courtyard of Goethe’s House Frankfurt, Germany

go ahead and do it, by all means, if that makes you feel good. but real femininity in a meaningful sense doesn't actually have anything to do with wearing pastels and braiding your hair and reblogging photos of baby animals. like...I'm sorry, but a lot of these aspiring tradwife type blogs sound just like troons and fetishists when it comes to what their idea of femininity and womanhood is, that it's about this carefully cultivated soft pink twirly dresses baby deer slave kink aesthetic, "oh I long to be on my knees servicing my man when I'm not barefoot in the kitchen because I have no brain in my head" kind of mentality. it doesn't come across as genuine or well-thought-out, it comes across as a fetish or a pinterest board.

people have different interpretations of what "trad" means and I'm not going to argue the details like whether you have to be religious or standards of modesty or how many kids you have to have etc, but it does worry me that either A. the people promoting this lifestyle don't really know what it's about in a healthy way and are setting themselves up for bad relationships where they're taken advantage of, or B. are just doing it as a barely-disguised kink and don't actually even attempt to mean it. it gives the entire movement a bad reputation.

being traditional does NOT mean women are inferior to men, that women have nothing meaningful to contribute to anything outside of raising kids and cleaning the house, that men should not listen to their wives, that women are brainless, that women must accept abuse or belittlement, or that women are not adult human beings. traditional gender roles are NOT about one sex being superior to the other. it's about there being different roles for different people, all of which are necessary for the smooth functioning of society. even in a dynamic where the man is the head of the household and the woman follows his lead, that does not mean that the man makes every decision unilaterally and does not take into account his wife's feelings and needs. I am always saying this, if you want a tradwife then you need to be tradhusband material, which means respecting your wife as a full person. unfortunately a lot of aspiring tradwives don't seem to understand this any better than the incels who want tradwives and talk like "oh I'm just a silly little bimbo who can't be expected to have a single thought, just put a cock in me 🥴" and then wonder why there's so much legitimate worry that people like this are going to get themselves into terrible relationships or why they aren't taken seriously.

men and women having different roles is fine. but the reason men and women have different roles is because they are meant to be partners in life, not master and servant or goon and sex doll. a traditional woman's role is to support her husband, but support does not always just mean never having your own opinion, just like a traditional man's role is to lead and protect but that doesn't mean that he doesn't take his wife's wishes and needs into consideration. a good relationship will be built on mutual trust and respect and support as well as being able to help each other be the best version of themselves they can be in a loving way. a woman who sees herself as nothing more than a servant is not actually being a good partner. a man could hire a maid or a prostitute; that is not what your role is supposed to be.