Elfy Paladin

the best fanfiction you've ever read was written by a woman in her 40s before she made dinner for her kids. it was written by a teenager after school when they should've been studying for a history test. and a barista came up with the idea while they cleaned the espresso machine and busser fact-checked it on their break and the post-doc edited between writing grant proposals and the nurse apologized for typos in the notes after a long shift and behind every drabble and one-shot and multi-chapter fic there is a person with a wonderful and interesting and chaotic life and it is such a privilege that we get to be apart of it because they decided to do this thing we all share, for fun.

seeing discourse you’re not at all involved in and only barely equipped to understand the proper nouns of on the for your page like spotting a house fire in a moving car on the highway

our literature is so beautiful

so I got into grad school today with my shitty 2.8 gpa and the moral of the story is reblog those good luck posts for the love of god

i need all the help i can get for finals

I could use some luck

Is that a miette?

Pride for you!  Pride for a thousand years!!

you COME OUT to miette? you come out to her as queer? oh! oh! pride for mother! pride for mother for One Thousand Years!!!!

[ID: a grey, black and white cat sitting on the floor. It has very wide eyes and is holding a rainbow flag in its mouth. /End ID]

Bear religion probably fucking rocks. You're a fucking bear, you're the deadliest thing on earth, once a year an endless supply of salmon just flings itself up the river to gorge on and then you nap for 3 months.

The most delicious food in the world is protected by tiny demons who can defend it from everyone except you. Your natural armor is thick enough that you can just eat the damn hive while they buzz around you. God's chosen animals right there

love the idea of bears being the chosen species actually. having a near death experience and glimpsing heaven and realising it's just full of bears, no humans at all, humans not ensouled actually, humans an accidental byproduct of God's plan for bears

this is gonna get me put on a list somewhere but if Rhaenyra and Daenerys could have met they would not end that interaction as friends Rhaenyra would be putting Daenerys in the SJW cringe compilation

We should hang out soon before one of us evolves or disappears

hey I wonder what happens if I put powdered milk into carbonated water

my cereal is loud and it's demanding to know why I would sin against both nature and god so thoughtlessly

...how does it taste?

bad

I have mastered the potion: Instant Spoiled Milk, therefore earning the rank of shittiest alchemist currently alive.