[richard siken, a primer for the small weird loves|dirty valentine| the dislocated room| dirty valentine| a primer for the small weird loves]
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occasionally subtle
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will byers stan first human second

Andulka

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Love Begins
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@sardonicheir
[richard siken, a primer for the small weird loves|dirty valentine| the dislocated room| dirty valentine| a primer for the small weird loves]

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love between vampires can be one thing, or it can be countless things. however you want me, i can be that for you. you said you want me to be present as your maker? i can be a maker for you. i want to be your maker. disregard the last 500 years in which i was repulsed by the idea. i don't have any complicated feelings about that at all. you said you want cool vampire powers even though you're a three year old fledgling? i can help you become a daywalker, a skill that apparently takes centuries to develop. you're an investigative journalist, don't you want a scandal on lestat? i can give you a scandal. i want to help you finish that job. lestat fucks his mom. isn't that good? aren't i useful? aren't i worth keeping around?
you couldnt imagine what it was like to be 10 years old and listen to radioactive by imagine dragons
its … it’s almost like it was enough to make your systems blow
Carbon County series by John Sanderson.

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rolin jones
“we can’t believe X because it was lestat’s perspective, we can’t believe any of the scenes with claudia from the first two seasons because they were from louis’s perspective”
i’m sorry. i understand that this is the Unreliable Narrator Show but if we’re supposed to be weary of every single scene because anything we see could be a misremembering or a lie, what the fuck am i watching the show for. i want to believe at least SOME of what im spending time every week to watch actually happened. it feels like the writers don’t actually need to have consistent writing for ANY character because they can just hand-wave anything that doesn’t work as being a “biased recollection of events”. so like why should i be expected to care about what’s being shown to me then.
the decision of the writers of tvl to not clarify lestat's role in the trial, why he was there, how exactly and to what extent he was coerced, to never address it, to never have lestat explain himself to louis, but to treat it as though lestat is obviously innocent and has nothing to explain.........................................................profound
so lets get this straight... in season 2, sam didn't want lestat to laugh during the louvre scene, but rolin insisted. this season, we skip over the vampire armand chapter of the vampire lestat, which includes his backstory abt being trafficked & a csa victim. we have lestat sing a song alluding to armands history of sexual abuse that's kind of meant to be a shitty thing but also somewhat "justified" (based on what cast & crew have been saying). we see armands fathermakergroomer before any of the history/context between armand & marius. and then we have armand and daniel release a video of lestat being incestuously abused by his mother??? without any sort of commentary on anything??? not to mention the line abt armand erasing the memories of daniel "using a student aggressively" and im supposed to believe this show cares about his character?
what. the fuck
iwtv ep6 spoilers. big rape/sa trigger warning

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trying my hardest to enjoy TVL for what it is because if I think of what it could have been I'll go insane
The showrunners chose to make Louis and Claudia black and experience life in the Jim crow era. They chose to do the full race swap in season 1, not just making the characters but also the story black. They chose to racialize the violence that both Louis and Claudia face throughout the first season. No one was forcing their hands and they got praised for the stuff they did in the first two seasons, for bringing in the added nuance of systemic racism. So why should I as an audience member of colour give them any grace when they choose to write dialogues containing numerous racialized and gendered micro aggressions not just towards Louis or Claudia but also minor characters like Dee or Lemuel who weren't necessarily supposed to exist as they are (black) in the show?? Why is Daniel (a white man) who is supposed to be a Pulitzer prize winning investigative journalist who was lecturing Louis on his own story about the racism he faced referring to him as a "bucket of Louisiana fried chicken"?? Why is Armand textually belittled for being a CSA victim while Lestat is endlessly provided with grace and understanding in the text of the show for his victimhood?? Who thought it was alright to adapt a scene from the books involving white characters talking about parental betrayal and insert racially charged dialogues (that too old school racist shit not even the n word) when it was unnecessary to preserve the nuance of the scene?? Why is this show denying the racialized nature of domestic violence that they chose to portray in S1 ??? (Lestat getting mildly annoyed that Louis didn't enjoy going to the operas in nola when he had to act as Lestat's servant to be allowed in tf??) Why is Gabriella like that??
I cannot help but look at this season of the show as a sign of the times tbh. IWTV aired during a very liberal era of entertainment and now that fascism and white supremacy are on the rise everywhere white entertainers have become comfortable enough to fall back into old habits. Never thought this show in particular would have this problem when I watched the first season but it is what it is I guess
I admit i'm not the biggest Lestat stan. I just overall enjoy Louis, Claudia, Armand, and Daniel more than Lestat. But this season did Lestat such a disservice.
The wolves' scene was cut short. Why was it during spring and not winter? Show the bleakness of the landscape, Lestat is all alone with his two dogs, trying to save a town that didn't care about him. You didn't even need to show wolves on screen to show Lestat was hunting them--sound effects would have been effective if the budget was that bad. The fact that Lestat only went after them because his mommy told him to, which was NOT in the book, removes all of his agency during this scene. Horrible.
Gabi was done so dirty and as a result both her and Lestat suffered. Yes, Gabi physically/mentally abused Lestat. But Lestat has not been able to talk about how it's affected him this season. The new episode had him crying and throwing up but that was not actual dialogue. He just brushes past the abuse and I feel like the writers did not know how to handle this with the tact that they had in the first two seasons. Instead, they reduced Gabi to a horny mustache twirling villain that has no redeemable or human qualities. Anne Rice wrote very deeply flawed characters, but no one was ever "pure" evil. The writers certainly made a choice in removing Gabi's agency--all she does is bang Lestat every 5 seconds--and she has no personality beyond horny mom.
Nicky! In the book, Nicky GAVE Lestat the wolfkiller cloak. They changed it so Nicky's dad gave it to him, which does Nicky AND Lestat a disservice. I am forever PISSED about Lestat (the writers) brushing Nicky off as "teehee Bipolar Boyfriend". Why aren't more people angry about this blatant ableism? There wasn't even any buildup for Nicky to be bipolar in the first place. Nickistat scenes this season were, what, 10 mins total? There was no explanation, no buildup to the inevitable downfall of Nicky. One second they're laughing and having fun and the next, Nicky cuts his hand off. Why did Nicky cut his hand off? In the books, Armand did it as punishment because Nicky was roaming the streets out of madness and drawing attention to vampires. What was the point of this change? Just to show teehhee Nicky was just ~~~crazy~~~? Nicky continues to haunt Lestat this season by spouting gibberish that makes no sense just to refute yes, Nicky was always teehee craaaaaazy. Horrible.
See, the trial wasn't Lestat's fault it was actually ALL Armand and Sam's fault. Lestat was dragged to Paris by Armand/Sam and forced to kill Claudia and Madeline teehee. I am of the belief that the trial was making, as Santiago put it in an earlier episode, EVERYONE complicit. Armand was complicit--he gave stage directions, didn't tell Louis/Claudia about their impending execution. Sam was complicit; Santiago had him write up a script and star in it. Lestat was complicit; he got on a boat and traveled to Paris to perform on stage. Armand/Lestat had many opportunities to prevent, undo, or stop the play but they did not. There is not a single person who is at blame--all of them are at blame. Except Louis/Claudia/Madeline, obviously, just going to say that before someone thinks I'm blaming them too. They were innocent.
Lestat/Armand was an important relationship for both of them. It's not the endgame ship (sorry Lesmand fans) but it was still a great stepping point for both of them. Lestat had his mom (ugh) and Nicky, who was human at the time and didn't understand what it meant to be a vampire yet. This was the first relationship he had where he was on a equal footing--dating a vampire who was not related to him or thought he was human. On the other side, Armand only had Marius. This was also an important relationship for him to feel more comfortable in. Again, it was an equal footing for him. Lestat wasn't his maker or older than him. If anything, Armand had slightly more power in the relationship because he knew vampire skills Lestat didn't know. Armand still freely shared the information (as a way to bargain his usefulness, sadly) and they became closer as a result. The writers think this relationship was stupid and brushed it off, but they're fucking morons, pardon my french. It was essential for Lestat and Armand's realization that they can have love and flourish in its afterglow. They really should have kept Armand cutting Nicky's hands off to help push Lestat away from Armand. This is Armand's nature as a gremlin, wanting to take control through violence. Alas! Lestat just dropped Armand for Gabi for no discernable reason, I guess. Again, Lestat chosing to leave Armand because of how Nicky was treated would have given him agency. No, Gabi yoinked him away, no agency needed!
Claudia. What was the point of the s2 finale with Lestat sobbing about Claudia? Claudia was nonexistent this season, according to Lestat. IMO she should have been haunting Lestat from day one. He helped kill his own daughter--who was very much similar to Lestat. Could've had great parallels of Lestat and Claudia's behaviors but no...Nicky haunts Lestat more apparently? I love ya Nicky, don't get me wrong, but I feel like you should have been sharing haunting time with Claudia.
I might add more to this later but this is what I've got for now. i'm not even a lestat stan and this season did him suuuuuuuuch a disservice lol
There are some points of tvl criticism I'm willing to debate and where I can very much see both sides (or even think the #haters are stretching it a little) but like. You cannot really deny that this season has shown a pattern of prioritizing white characters and their emotional journey over characters of color. On top of that, so many of the jokes are "punching down", starting with the pronoun joke in ep 1 followed by a continuous barrage of throw-away comments. And then, six episodes into a season with an all-white writers room, we have Claudia say "there's something etched in your ribs that says you're a slave". There's no reckoning with how horrifically racist this statement is, neither in the text nor the paratext. It's just sitting there, poisoning what otherwise could have been an incredible scene. Poisoning a season that felt like it was actually slowly finding its footing. It's white privilege to watch that scene and not feel, on some level, attacked by those racist words put in a Black actor's mouth by white writers. To not be haunted by the racist implications of "my bleak, black life." Before, a lot of the writing choices registered as thoughtless; at this point, it's hard to see them as anything but malicious.
why does lestat get to be held and comforted and spoken to kindly when he has a traumatic breakdown? why is lestat not held equally or more responsible than louis for claudia's death? why are we acting as if lestat is more deserving of grace and forgiveness when absolutely nothing has been done to suggest that he didn't intentionally orchestrate claudia's execution? why isn't lestat questioned? why does lestat get the final word?

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Imagine if people watched Interview with the Vampire and it inspired them to think about how the past is in a very real way inaccessible to us and memory can be misleading even when you're not being dishonest and different people can have different experiences of the same event that feel emotionally true and are very real to the people who experienced them even if they contradict each other and often you will never be able to know what really happened and how this can make repairing damaged relationships difficult and threatening to a person's sense of self
Armand doing the Twelve Steps makes perfect sense because this man is just so desperate to Belong and to be Good and he will twist and turn and warp himself and the world in a hundred ways trying to make that work.
And on one hand it is so painful watching him Really Earnestly Trying and watching everyone respond with rage.
On the other hand, in their own way Daniel and Lestat are both telling him to be sincere, and those apology notes were not sincere: they were classic fawn response "everything is my fault forever" and didn't actually apologize for THE THINGS DANIEL AND LESTAT ARE MAD ABOUT.
In Daniel's case the anger is straightforward: Daniel wants sincerity, Daniel wants the truth, Daniel wants to break people down and see the seething belly beneath. He met Armand at a moment where Armand was fully unhinged and hiding nothing, and since then (as far as he remembers) Armand has always been putting on a show. And after two years of Daniel miserably pining for him, Armand shows up with yet another show. Of course Daniel's going to be furious, and of course Daniel's going to push every button he can find because that's what Daniel does.
In Lestat's case it's easier to see his acts as purely hate-driven, but on third watch I actually think he too is demanding sincerity. "Be yourself" is a real statement. "Big Boss" is clearly catty and petty and all over the place (Armand having a bad hair day, since when) but the actual accusations are pretty clear: you want to control the narrative, you think you and you alone have the right to decide who is good and bad, you killed Claudia.
And Armand didn't apologize for any of those things, in fact Armand is still trying to control the narrative and still trying to decide who's good and bad, he's just moving himself to "bad" and moving Lestat to "good."
(side note gosh Lestat you sure do have a thing for controlling judgy self-flagellating men maybe you should explore that about yourself)
It's especially striking that Lestat knew lying would eat Armand up inside. It's easy to dismiss Armand as manipulative--and frequently he is manipulative--but that doesn't mean he's gleefully going around deceiving people. He's just frantically trying to be whoever he needs to be so people will love and accept him, because that's how he's survived all this time. He has no idea how to be himself, and he's probably terrified by the idea, since the message he's received over and over again his whole life is that being himself is Bad and Wrong and the only thing lovable about him is his looks (a cycle he then perpetuates by doing worse and worse things in order to either persuade people to love him, punish people for not loving him, or most vicious of all punish people for being loved when he is not.)