sarcasticassian

grab somebody sexy tell em (shane drugged up in the hospital voice) Heeey

i have a lot of thoughts on the matter but i will say that fandom moving from semi-private blogs and communities to extremely public and algorithm-driven social media was a huge mistake that has changed fandom culture for the worse

attaching something to an email is so scary. what if i accidentally put hard-core porn in there. i don't think i have any downloaded but what if i do and i attached it to the email. what then.

as part of their ongoing boycott, Canada will no longer provide the US with totally real long-distance girlfriends who definitely exist

Shane shortly before waking Ilya up at the cottage: ‘Hmmmmm, I can’t trap him with a baby. wait let me google……okay i definitely can’t get pregnant. Hold on…..sea-horse dads?…..nevermind…..can i adopt a baby-trap?…………no I’d just have a kid……………………okay wait what if we like coached some kids? Like they wouldn’t be ours but like- we wouldn’t be able to break-up because of the kids. Am i fucking on drugs? What the fuck am i thinking……..wait………..like a team of kids but it’s like charity…………cause men leave their children all the time but it would be a really bad look to leave a charity……………….i can make a charity and it’ll have kids and we’ll help the kids……..and Ilya likes kids…………and he likes me………..and he’ll wanna stay with me forever….so he’ll be baby trapped AND we’ll be doing a good thing.* “Ilya wake up i have an idea.”