Sweet Sapphics

This comic is genuinely how I remember which is which.

The core appeal of Willy Wonka is that he's a nigh-omnipotent maniac who uses his near limitless powers over reality to trick shitty people into killing themselves. You can't make him the protagonist of a whimsical coming of age tale - you have to treat him like Jason Voorhees, or Dracula, or any other horror icon. Give him some new victims and new interesting kills and set him loose, that's all audiences want.

I feel like I watched a somewhat different movie...

I'm not gonna lie the secret to success for a great many people is absolutely stimulant abuse

It doesn't matter if that fic has been in your drafts for years and is now self-indulgent to the point of parody. If Steven Moffatt is allowed to do it professionally, you are allowed to do it for fun.

#and steven moffat does it with NO love in his smug little heart!!!! YOU DO!!!!!! <3

can I make a confession that might get me in trouble

praying for everyone Black in Belfast rn. hella Black ppl lost they homes as a result of this antiblack terrorism.

Let’s fucking go

Oh my fetish? It's people with fetishes. Love a freak I can fluster by doing something innocuous

Bringing this back because NOTHING is more hot than someone with a clearly defined fetish I can play into. I want you stuttering and begging for it as I'm completely unaffected.

People die on the job every summer. Remember that water and shade breaks are crucial when working in the heat, and calling emergency services for signs of serious heat illness (fatigue, nausea/vomiting, headaches, dizziness, clammy skin, confusion, agitation, slurred speech, high body temperature, rapid heart rate, etc.) is entirely appropriate. If you’re afraid to call 911 for reasons such as being undocumented, you’ll need to get very familiar with how to prevent, recognize, and treat heat illness. If you are symptomatic and not allowed a break, water, or medical treatment, walk out. No matter how broke you are, your job is not worth your life.

Official please put yourself first sign

“i also choose this guy’s dead wife” was easily the #1 funniest thing to ever be written on the internet.

i do also feel the need to add that phil8248 really liked the joke. he said his wife had always had a dark sense of humour, even about her illness and death, and seeing the joke made him feel like he was laughing with her one last time.