jerking that thang asunder rn

dress codes that arent ppe are stupid as fuck. as an adult human being with a (relatively) functioning brain i have never walked into a place and given a fuck what an employee was wearing. “professional” okay bitch i can make up adjectives too. “grundlous” see easy

whats grundlous mean

of or pertaining to grundle

My favorite banned terms on this site are "suicide prevention" and "safe sex"

Fuck nasty and kill yourself inmediately after

Salmon male grindset

its incredibly funny to me that the rest of the internet thinks tumblr is some sort of internet deadzone but every reference they make can be traced back to this website somehow. they dont think they’re quoting a tumblr post from 2011 but they are. they think they came up with goncharov but don’t know it started with a fucking shoe

very well, genie. for my second wish, make the gatorade cooler at the big football game instantly achieve boiling temperature .8 seconds before they dump it over the winning coach's head

for my third wish, genie, i want 🤮 patriots tickets

i am reminded of one time flying out of boston, when i was sitting in the back of coach. as we were taxiing every single tv as far as i could see was tuned to the patriots game, and it occurred to me that if i waited til right after takeoff and then loudly voiced the opinion that the new england patriots are a pack of faggots, that i could both incite, bear witness to, and possibly be killed in the world's first airborne sports riot

What was the first wish

incredibly funny that "and they were roommates" became like. code for being gay. we have no damn CLUE what gossip that woman was talking about we just decided it was homosexual behavior

let's play doctor and patient I'll go first 🥰 you're faking.

Turkey is so cool. shame about every aspect of its history and politics

country or bird?

country. I refer to the bird as a Türkiye

If nothing else, please do understand that getting Jimmy Kimmel fired means we are far enough into the "and then they came for" poem that it is to "and then they came for the mildly inoffensive comedian who is a rich white guy but he hurt the president's feelings"

Used to be Italian but now I’m just ian because she took it al in the divorce

I want to get a boob job after I die so that at my open casket funeral when everyone's looking at my beautiful body they'll all be like did the mortician...? no....