Back when I worked at the hospital, I had to take MRI training and it was my favorite thing every time. It was only like 10 minutes long and went a little something like this:

Hey. The MRI is basically a really big magnet and by basically I mean it is and we literally never turn it off. It's like really big. Really really big and powerful and The Magnet is always on. We don't turn it off Ever, for any reason. We mean it bro, The Magnet is literally always on. It's crazy strong and will definitely kill you. So don't bring any metal into the MRI room, man. You will fuck up the machine (because The Magnet is always on) and then you will die (again, because The Magnet is always on). Here's some fun questions for you to test your understanding!

1) The ______ is always on.

2) The Magnet is ______ on.

3) How often is The Magnet on?

4) The Magnet is always __.

5) The Magnet is always on. T/F

6) The Magnet is usually on but we know to turn it off for you because you're a very special boy :) T/F

7) My weak fleshy body can survive the wrath of The Magnet. T/F

8) Look at this 500 lbs steel hospital bed, which The Magnet has crumpled into an origami crane. Imagine if that was you.

9) Is The Magnet ever off?

10) Sometimes we turn The Magnet off. T/F

Thank you for taking MRI training. We hope you learned that The Magnet is always on, because it is. It's on Right Now and it will be on every time you come to the MRI. Have fun and remember: The Magnet is always on!

"They didn't exist" (terra nullius). Complete denial of Indigenous presence in a given area (country, province, etc). Includes denial of Indigeneity, e.g. "Indigenous Peoples are Settlers too".

"If they did, they weren't here" (terra nullius). Denial that Indigenous People inhabit/travel/harvest/exist in a specific area. Often based on euro-centric definitions of evidence of occupation.

"If they were, they didn't use the land" (doctrine of discovery). Denial that Indigenous People have a connection with the Land. Often based on euro-centric worldview of the land as something to be owned and extracted.

"If they did, they didn't deserve it" (great chain of being). Denial that Indigenous People have rights to their Lands. Often based on euro-centric value judgements of "primitive vs. civilized", "nomadic vs. sedentary".

"If they did, they lost it" (right of conquest). Denial that Indigenous People retain their rights to their Lands. Often based on colonially imposed European systems of law/"might makes right" worldviews.

"If they didn't, it doesn't matter anymore" (Westphalian sovereignty). Denial that Indigenous Rights are still binding and take precedence. Often based on false claims of supremacy of colonial legal institutions and systems.

"If it does, we need to move on" (liberalism). Denial that violations of Indigenous Rights requires redress. Often based on claims redress is "disruptive/unfair/reverse racism" & false calls for "equality".

"If we can't, we are you" (self-indigenization). Denial of separateness of Indigenous Peoples and Rights. Often based on attempts to reduce Indigenous Rights to Human Rights, claim Indigeneity, etc.

"ᴅᴏᴏʀ ꜱᴀɪᴅ ʜᴇ ʜɪᴍꜱᴇʟꜰ ᴡᴀꜱ ɪɴ ᴀʟʟ ᴏꜰ ᴛʜᴇᴍ ᴀᴛ ᴛʜᴇ ꜱᴀᴍᴇ ᴛɪᴍᴇ, ᴇɴᴅʟᴇꜱꜱʟʏ ꜱʜɪꜰᴛɪɴɢ ʙᴇᴛᴡᴇᴇɴ ᴛʜᴇᴍ."