Ye so I submitted that one on yuri vs yaoi. To get this out of the way immediately, that wasn't a direct attack on you. And I do both read and write Yuri fanfiction.
My question was, "HAVE YOU NOTICED" the difference. I was not insulting you or telling you to stop. And I was just curious if you have noticed and if you had any thoughts in the difference in amount of Yuri and yaoi fics. Obviously I'm not demanding more people write Yuri. I literally write it for myself.
And the reason I asked this is just because misogyny in fandoms does exist, and lesbians already don't get a lot of representation in mainstream media. (I'm not saying there is none, there just isnt as much as there are with gay men, don't twist my words.)
And the comparison to straight woman consuming yaoi content and straight men with lesbians was not one that I said was equivalent. I did not say it was the same thing, I said it "REMINDED ME." And I meant it in a sexual way, not people innocently consuming this content for comfort.
And finally the thing that inspired the original ask is just because I know women I worked worth who consume yaoi porn just to get off. I should have phrased my original question better, but I certainly didn't mean to attack women who consume yaoi for comfort instead of porn.
As a member of the queer community, I just find it disrespectful for people to consume Yuri or yaoi or whatever just to get off. I'm not one for censorship, don't assume I am, but I was just curious if consumming queer media to jerk off was something you cared at all about.
If not, whatever. But misogyny exists in fandoms, and weird sexual obsession over queer people exist and I wanted to know your take on that if you had one.
Again this wasn't an attack on anyone. It was meant to be a simple question. I wasn't judging you for reading or enjoying yaoi. Sorry if I offended you.
apologize if my original answer comes off rude. as to answer your question, I don’t “notice” the lack of yuri in fandom space, not because I dislike yuri but because all of my attention is focused on my mlm ship — so I don’t know what other parts of fandom space that I am not in are like. I only hear people talk about there not being enough yuri, but since I don’t seek out yuri contents and since yuri contents don’t show up on my algorithm to begin with, it’s not something I can physically see. not to mention my current fandom doesn’t have that many female characters. so it’s already a male-dominated fandom, because the main characters are males.
as for your second question about people getting off on yaoi/yuri — I get off on yaoi. my mlm ship is my source of comfort, yes. but it also turns me on. I write yaoi fanfics as a source of comfort and a kink. and I’ve always been very open about it.
I don’t see anything wrong with me, a woman, finding sexual pleasure in yaoi / the fictional things I enjoy and create, because it’s all fantasy. they are all fictional characters. they’re not real people, what turns me on doesn’t affect my real life moral compass or anybody in real life.
so I personally don’t mind men jerking off to yuri as long as it’s fictional characters and these men are not being creeps towards women in real life. as a women, I know there are men who are being grossly weird about women in real life, and I will never condone their gross behaviors. but that’s a different story. if we’re talking about fictional characters and if these men don’t bother women in real life, then what they enjoy in fiction—what fantasies they jerk off to—is their business. they’re not harming anybody.
my stance has always been: enjoy whatever you want, however you want, for whatever reasons, within the realm of fiction where no person or animal in real life is harmed.
again—and I say this with respect—thoughtcrimes are not real. what fictional things a person jerks off to is no one’s business but their own’s, as long as they don’t harm or harass people or animal in real life.
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