In full bloom

god released me into the wild and now he’s hunting me for sport

me comforting my mullet husband and assuring him that he is still masculine after he had to see another mans butt cheek

this is an image with a lot of power and while my instincts are telling me to lean into it I don’t feel like the life I’ve lived to this point has equipped me to do it safely

my wonka death would be asking mr wonka why he doesn’t solve world hunger, and he plays a little song on his flute and then the oompa loompas come and beat me into twinkie batter for my hubris

still doesnt explain the arm

nothing pisses me off more than the fact that 90% of women’s jeans have non-functioning pockets but baby clothes have proper pockets? what are babies carrying around that i’m not? baby wallets? fuck off

when i was a small child i carried around a little tiny pumpkin in my pockets for months

i retract my original statement. that is fair and important

#do u ever see shit like this and realize#that in the real world#this has literally no meaning#but seven thousand people on this website saw it#understood it#and then shared it with others#sometimes it just hits me (via literallyfuckeveryone)