Schloofus?!

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Come on down to our center thats two hours away so we can give assistance with your inability to walk or drive

- If using plates and silverware meant for kids means you will eat more often and/or find more joy out of eating, good! *

- If using a divided plate means you are going to feel more comfortable eating, good!

- If having a water bottle with your favorite character/show on it means you are going to drink more water, good!

- If having children's toothbrushes and toothpaste means you are going to brush your teeth more often, good!

- If watching tooth brushing videos aimed at kids makes brushing more enjoyable/helps prompt you to brush correctly, good!

- If taking a stuffed animal or other toy out with you means you are going to feel a little safer, good!

- If using a nightlight (esp one with characters on it) makes you feel safer and helps you sleep better, good!

- If you find coloring in books made for children/simpler pictures more enjoyable, good!

- If decorating your living space with "childish" things with characters or bright colors is going to make your space more enjoyable/usable, good!

- If using organization systems and prompts aimed at children is going to help you actually use them, good!

- If you enjoy media aimed at children, and it brings you joy and makes your days a little easier, good!

No matter what your age is, you are allowed to use the things that bring joy into your life or make your life easier to manage. You do not need to "grow up" or "do it like an adult". You can do it in whatever way works best for you. There should be no shame in it. I think some of us want to beat the allegations that autism makes us more "childlike" thinking it makes us more palatable, when having "age-inappropriate interests" are a commonly known trait. It is normal to have autistic traits when you have autism. You don't need to hide it or pretend you don't. Yes I know not all autistics are interested in this stuff either but that's not my focus

Someone: But have you considered that they [something that applies to many disabled adults]

Oh, that sounds rough. Not being able to explain yourself because you don't have the language you need .... Hmmmm...... That sounds familiar..... If only the people you're taking language from could understand Your Epic Struggle™ ....... Hmmm..... (/Sarcastic tone).

Nonverbal people and our culture and identity are being used for memes- and misrepresented by fully or partially verbal people. So... Consider: we don't owe you a bunch of language alternatives before you decide you don't "need" to be ableist towards us. We deserve better than that.

It is so incredibly violent to take language and descriptors from a group of people who categorically have a harder time accessing language than you. And on top of that, nonverbal people are supposed to coddle and hand-hold you through our pleas for you to stop being ableist towards us? Fuck off.

No, really. Fuck that ableist, downpunching bullshit. It shouldn't be our responsibility to gently guide you through language alternatives that aren't harmful. You're being ableist, so YOU go look for alternative language. It's literally on this website. Other nonverbal folks have done the labour to create masterposts of alternative words and phrases... All you have to do is use the search function.

Nonverbal people get written off as nitpicky or aggressive when we tell people not to misuse our identities for their convenience. Yet you're the ones causing harm to our community. You rely on us not being able to argue back in a way you find "acceptable", and use our struggles with language as a reason why it's ok for you to carry on ignoring us.

Nonverbal people aren't believed when we communicate we are nonverbal. This struggle to be understood is worsened when verbal or altverbal people decide to misuse the word nonverbal to mean "goes quiet when tired".

First snow is here, so of course we had to celebrate! So crunchy and fresh. ❄️

Someone’s tone changes. A message is shorter than usual. You get feedback that wasn’t meant to hurt you. And suddenly your body reacts like you’re in danger.

This is often called perceived attack. It’s when your nervous system reads threat before your brain has time to gather context. It doesn’t mean you’re dramatic, manipulative, or looking for conflict. It means your system learned that emotional safety could disappear quickly.

Perceived attack can look like:

Feeling instantly criticized or rejected

Getting defensive before you know why

Shutting down or lashing out to protect yourself

Ruminating for hours over something small

The feeling is real, even when the threat isn’t.

What helps is slowing the moment down:

Ask yourself what facts you actually have.

Notice whether this reaction matches the present or an old wound.

Give yourself time before responding when you can.