Feels and Funnies

shane hollander who has a strange look on his face for the rest of the day, which ilya clocks immediately and corners him as soon as they get home.

shane hollander who avoids the question like the plague until ilya pure the pieces together- “oh you liked being slapped, didn’t you, baby?”

shane hollander who’s cheeks burn and he turns away, ilya dragging him to the bedroom and guiding him to stand between his legs while he sits on the bed. shane hollander whose jaw drops when his husband says- “beg me for it, baby”, dropping to his knees before he can process the words and looking up in awe at ilya

Olga Mikutina (AUT)

I really want a fic where Grigori lives longer and the Hollander parents get time to really, properly, hate his guts while he's still alive. I'm imagining something that takes place at an end-of-year award ceremony, where Ilya just won, like, the Hart Memorial or Art Ross Trophy.

Ilya and Grigori are talking to a reporter during the post-ceremony reception, and the reporter asks how they feel about Ilya earning the trophy. And Grigori says something along the lines of, "I know next season Ilya will do better. Next time he will work hard and score more goals." It's a response that can easily pass as a joke, not too different from Ilya's own characteristic media boasts.

But to those who are familiar with how the Rozanov family operates behind closed doors - for those who know the shape of the wounds the Rozanov family likes to leave on their youngest member - it is so clear what Grigori is actually doing.

The reporter, and Grigori, and Ilya - and then later the general public watching the clip on repeat and through gifs and memes - do not expect Yuna Hollander to suddenly appear in the field of view of the camera and punch Grigori Rozanov directly in the face.

Grigori goes down hard, and Yuna says, icy-clear, "My son does not lose to someone who doesn't work hard." She turns away from Grigori to lock eyes with Ilya, every inch of her radiating fury, and says, "I am very proud of my son. He is talented, dedicated, and a gift to his team." And then she shakes out her hand, and lets security escort her out.

Most of the response to the incident is humor. Everyone knows what Yuna Hollander is like when it comes to hockey - she's as serious about the sport as Shane is, and it's not difficult to believe she's more likely to get physical over it than her multiple-year-Lady-Byng-winner son. Hockey fans think it's very funny and very believable that she punched someone for implying that it doesn't take hard work to best Shane Hollander - especially since it was a Rozanov that said it. Online, everyone makes jokes about the Hollander-Rozanov family blood feud.

A few people, though, see something else. Cliff Marlow watches the clip and recognizes as Ilya's body language goes from defensive to open and awed as Yuna fucking Hollander stares him down and says the words "talented, dedicated, a gift."

Hayden Pike sees Yuna's fury, recalls Ilya's infuriating tendency to act out as soon as the kids do - chirping past the line of acceptability a mere minute after they discover Ruby graffitied the living room with crayon, insulting the food after Arthur knocked his bowl off his high-chair, tracking mud onto the carpet as Jade ran down the hall in her rain boots - and feels his chest ache as a puzzle piece slots into place and redefines the whole picture. He sees Yuna shake out her bruised knuckles, and becomes aware of his own hand clenched into a fist, as he thinks of the way Ilya so instinctively moves to be a lightning rod, keeping the heat on himself and away from the kids.

David Hollander sees how Yuna captures Ilya's gaze and makes him listen as she declares my son over Grigori's prone body, and immediately starts planning a private night in.