Q’s Diary. (2026)

Started a first assembly of the new short the other day and ended up going through almost a decade of old media to make space. Ended up shedding a tear looking at all the past versions of myself throughout my 20’s only to realize halfway through, it all seemed to stop. The individuality, identity, fun, color, community, joy….and I realized at some point everything started to go inward- small, isolated, quiet, shy. . .Small spurts of joy- absolutely, but these days I see a version of myself I struggle to recognize. I feel fearful, envious, judgemental, shelled…. I don’t know what happened, but it breaks my heart a little bit. I don’t know whats been eating away at me, but it feels like my body has reached a point where it wants to expel and release it. I think the universe is responding to that bodily need with opportunity- I now have a place to live in London and a potential next project shooting there, I have two jobs taking me outside of LA next month…If I don’t decide for myself, I think the changes I need will be decided for me.