'tis not worth it

the following events ensued:

1. predictable lively discussion on the preparation of Wienerschnitzel, in which natives and wurstaboos are pro-puff and everybody else is like *confused dog head tilt* why wouldn’t you want the crust to stay ~attached to the thing you put it on? as with other fried foods?

2. thirty “Bad Schnitzel is my band name” jokes

3. thirty “Bad Schnitzel is my stripper name” jokes

4. one “ah yes, Bad Schnitzel! a lovely spa town” joke

5. this absolute masterpiece:

Simon being on stream and getting a call from Grace. He holds stream and takes it, chat hears "...what? Hold on," the screen changes to the ending stream card, "Ry? Ry! What do you mean they...." as the audio fades out and Simon has obviously left the room. No one knows what happened, stream ends and Simonsays goes radio silent for a long while.

Simon, meanwhile, is rushing through traffic to the place Ryland is. He confronts Eva on why he got a call that his HUSBAND was being sent into space to die, with the excuse that "he doesn't even have a dog" so nothing is waiting for him on earth.

They kept their relationship very private. Eva is taken aback by who she thought was Ryland's roomate fighting for his life rn. But she has a mission. She offers to let him see Dr. Grace, and that's it.

Grace tries to run. They drug him, and Simon hears talk of using his now-present husband as leverage to make sure he doesn't get far. Simon makes a choice.

One thing he has never told Ryland is his early obsession with the stars. Yadda, yadda, my idea is that he did astronaut training when he was young and so he knows he's coma resistant and how to fo stuff- he tells Eva that if Ryland is going into space, so is he.

Cue Grace waking up on Mary with two dead bodies and one still asleep. Freaking out cause he doesn't remember anything, and then freaking out more when he realises that the still asleep person has the same last name as him, a similar wedding ring to his, and a picture of their wedding in his bag.

Rocky and Grace bond over the question of "how I'd Grace mate doing?" Cause he'll if Grace knows! He doesn't even remember him!

Simon wakes up when Grace is rushing to save Rocky from the teomeba leak.

Also the idea of what happens after time go fishing and now Rocky has to watch over two humans instead of one 😭

Simon waking up and Grace hearing “eye movement detected.” And rushing into the medical bay where the human who shared his last name is freaking the fuck out about the robot but as soon as he sees Grace is like “you’re safe- oh god you’re safe-“ because I hc Stratt didn’t give Simon the amnesia like she did with Grace.

So Grace is like “why can’t I remember you? I’m married to you but I can’t-“

Simon feels absolutely heartbroken but doesn’t have time as Grace explains really quickly what has been happening whilst Simon was still in a coma so now Rocky is in for a surprise when he sees the human who was in a coma is finally awake! New friend for Rocky!

"New human! New human! Leaky blob like Grace, question?"

"... Angel, wtf is that thing?"

"What that word mean, question?"

Simon being sure to fill gaps in Grace's memory.

The BIGGEST moment in my mind is the moment Grace remembers he was forced on the mission. He's hidden behind a counter and hyperventilating and just hears "Angel?"

Simon will always reassure Grace that he wasn’t a coward!

I imagine Grace one night whilst watching Rocky sleep, he asks “can you….can you tell me how we met? I’m starting to slowly remember but I want to hear it from you.”

Simon telling him softly and grace rests his head on Simon’s shoulder and Simon telling him “you should go to sleep, sunlight. I’ve done enough sleeping for the three of us.”

And he puts the quilt around his shoulders and Grace blushes and shyly cuddles closer to him and whispers “are you sure, moonlight?”

Simon smiles softly “yeah. I’m sure.” He kisses his forehead and smiles softly “you remembered the pet name you gave me.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. You gave it to me because one night, we went for a walk and you said I-“

And this I without even going into how earth would deal with all of this! Simon's chat, editors, mods, online friends and the like. All seeing Simonsays go into space out of nowhere.

Stratt going on trial and Simon's streams and voice-mail are used as evidence. Simon had half a mind to record the call Grace told him they're sending him by force. Eva never gets respect back from the public, even more than in canon, because she told a loved man he was expendable.

Simon and Grace send the beetles back and Simonsays uploads one more video. "Simonsays goodbye." It's a video Simon recorded on the Mary, specifically asking it to be put online. It's 45 minutes of jokes and memories that rivals technoblede's death announcement. He says that he's going to erid with papa star and that he hopes him and the audience look at their suns and are looking at each other.

(Also you saying it rivals technoblade’s death announcement I can’t- I never watched him but I saw his video and sobbed like I did know him.)

sickening… hashtag when you autisticallt infodump and then your boywhatever the fuck is so overcome w/ adoration for you he HAS to interrupt you to do something gay. tch…

close ups below

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