Bored and deadly

The law and order sound but the second beat is a clown honk

this is what i wanna see from robert pattinsons batman 

Ok but this just shows how fucking ridiculous the female character animations are LMFAO what the fuck is that walk

You need a new friend, that sounds great.

?????

if i tell you any more they’ll put a price on my head

@spiritspodcast

vampires always like “i could kill you if I wanted” like? yeah? so could another human being. so could a dog. so could a dedicated duck. you arent special

12? Wow you have high hopes try 9.

if there was a post to describe australia, this is it

wake up australia 

It’s cold here, so they just bounce off the windows and lie there and twitch spasmodically while you look for the shovel.

Basically hurling themselves at windows is the worst thing birds do

yeah man a kookaburra literally flew into a classroom at my high school and just sat his smug ass down on top of the desk for a good 20 minutes

why has nobody mentioned the fact that in australia there are 3-4 months a year where everybody just accepts that they’re going to get attacked by magpies. It is literally called “swooping season” and these birds will fly down to peck your fucking face, and people get their eyes ripped out and shit, it’s fucking brutal.

My teacher had to go to hospital and have surgery because of swooping season. It was in the parking lot of school and all the kids would do a mad dash towards the car as the magpies tried to kill us.

no but when you’re 12 years old and riding your bike like mad on the way home from school with an icecream bucket on your head with like branches and shit sticking out if it to scare them off and none of this is considered strange

what the actual fuck australia 

I am pretty sure all of these Australia stories are a massive, globally-spanning trolling effort, and only the people who have visited the country are allowed to be in on the joke.

Australia: the only country where it is necessary to sign a peace treaty with the birds in order to stay unmangled.

They lost a war against emus. The the magpie stories are unsurprising.

what… what happened with the emus

The Great Emu War of 1932: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Emu_War

Note: this is not ferret abuse, they really do enjoy being carried like sacks of potatos.

As a ferret owner I can confirm that my three ferrets do not give a single fuck about being held like that. A ferret WILL let you know if it doesn’t like how you’re holding it. But they like being turned into potato sacks for some reason.

Yeah ferrets get super limp sometimes when you hold them, plus they have a flexible spine and ribs, it doesn’t bother them a bit. They are just loose sacks of meat and kleptomania. 

Me continuing to make my extremely niche posts while gesturing with a consenting ferret

Do you ever hear someone say something about your field of interest that is wrong and you have to stop yourself from physically cringing but you gotta stay strong and cool cause you don’t wanna be ‘That NerdTM’?

there is no deep meaning to this, this is when I see people refering to Excalibur as “The Sword in The Stone”

Wait I though the sword in the stone is Excalibur. What is it then?

The Sword in the Stone is Caliburn, and was the way be became king. Excalibur was the sword given to him by the Lady of the Lake after he broke Caliburn fighting King Pellinore.

I have been educated today and I appreciate it