Welcome to the plaza!

so everyone here will be subjected to my live-blogging

Nigel Farage is the leader of Reform UK, a far right party who are currently in the process of a serious bid to become the UK government. they are just straight up evil.

Count Binface is an intergalactic space warrior with a bin on his head. he likes to run as a novelty candidate in general and mayoral elections. a big thing he likes to do is run as a candidate against the incumbent prime minister:

(Also pictured: Boris Johnson, Elmo)

Anyway, in brief:

Nigel Farage is currently in the midst of a big scandal about his finances

He has decided to deal with this by 1) making a show of nobly resigning from parliament and then 2) immediately running in the resulting by-election

He has stated that he is letting 'the people' judge his actions and implied that if he wins that will prove that he has been exonerated in the court of public opinion

His goal was presumably to get a big resounding win over the other parties, proving that The People still love him.

the other parties have thus far decided that this is a 'vanity election' and, well, there is one very easy way to ensure that he will not beat any of them, and that is simply not to play.

and as a result the only person who has so far confirmed they are running against him is Count Binface. no matter the outcome this makes Nigel Farage look like, u know, a fucking clown.

He also did an interview:

an important thing to know about Count Binface is that he was previously Lord Buckethead, pictured here with Theresa May in 2017.

Lord Buckethead previously ran against Margaret Thatcher in 1987 and against John Major in 1992. Lord Buckethead ran for the Gremloids party.

Officially all Lord Bucketheads are the same Lord Buckethead who went away for a while and returned; however, it has come to light that Lord Buckethead (1987, 1992) and Lord Buckethead (2017) were two different guys under the bucket.

Following the 2017 general election the original creator of Lord Buckethead (not either of the guys who had worn the costume) asserted his legal rights over the character and 2017 Lord Buckethead acquiesced. and so, Count Binface came into being.

In the 2019 general election Lord Buckethead and Count Binface both ran against Boris Johnson, Binface as an indepent and Buckethead having joined the Monster Raving Looney Party. (NB this Lord Buckethead was a third different guy, not 87/92 Buckethead)

Lord Buckethead won the race (ie, got marginally more votes than Count Binface) but has not stood in an election since whereas Count Binface has been very prolific, running in two mayoral elections, two by-elections, and one further general election in 2024:

Except in the hour of need, a binface stepped up.

And it pissed me off so badly that I spent the ENTIRE WORK DAY today compiling evidence from every project my team has ever done for her, pulling past emails she’d sent us, putting together an entire case proving that she had been the problem all along. That she got projects mixed up, that she’d made requests that were nonsensical, literally everything you could possibly imagine. Screenshots of emails, reports we’d submitted, EVERYTHING.

This woman in particular has been terrorizing my team for years, her name is almost a slur in my office, I had simply had ENOUGH of her.

I put all of this evidence together and sent it to all of my bosses at 4:30pm. Then I took a long break to eat a sweet treat and drink some tea.

After my break, my bosses all called in an emergency meeting with me and they said they read my report and fucking loved it. And I sat on a teams call with my boss’ boss as she wrote my nemesis the scathing email I had always fantasized about sending, using the evidence I’d compiled, and hit send.

I have a friend I know from when we were both 6. She is the only person living nearby and so she saw me go from walking through limping to wheelchair on a daily basis. I keep her updated on my health even tho we rarely hang out anymore. She was gonna come over yesterday and I had to cancel. She asked if I can’t hang out later that day. When I said i won’t feel better later, that if I feel that bad in the morning later will only get worse she got annoyed and “joked” that I’m just finding excuses. And I was surprised, she knows all about me being disabled after all? So, a bit taken aback, I told her it’s a normal thing for me.

“But you got the diagnosis now, aren’t you better?? I thought you’ll get better now”

So stoked to share the official trailer for the Avatar Aang movie, now releasing JULY 25th on Paramount+!!