not to be too parasocial but the way alex speaks about weight (ie in the ig posts tiktok) is so :((

i hate it when people mistake "etymology" with "entomology." like, i know where they coming from but it still bugs me

i LOVE the word decorum . like please! have some decorum ✋

it has always been a dream of mine to relax

is it too early or can we start screaming now

in retrospect perhaps we should have started sooner

this post is the equivalent of a newspaper from the day of the outbreak being blown past by the wind after you wake up in a post apocalyptic world

I could never wear any of those dumb “I hope both teams have fun” shirts because no I hope my team wins by 30 and the other team explodes on the field

(Comes back from the evil sorceress’s tower covered in suspiciously placed bruises and poorly hidden hickeys) Uh Yeah Uhm she was torturing me Haha don’t worry abt it. By the way have you guys ever considered joining Her Dark Army

i dont even know where the bit ends and i begin