Oooh Me Sleebpy

I used your bathroom 15 times last night… yeah. Toilet’s gone basically. Worn down to a nub

Like an old man to a construction site

had a bad low blood pressure moment last night and messily asked my partner for saltines and water before realizing i should probably ask for the Blood Pressure Medication I Need To Take. while they went to go grab it though i still had water and crackers so in a daze i took a swig of water but didnt swallow and then tried to cram 2 saltines in my mouth. full of water. in bed. with mouth full of water

Oh My God Damn

everyone get unemployed. i will provide for us.

I love how safe everyone in the comments feels about being entirely dependant on a potentially psychopathic benefactor 😁

im nice…..

He’s literally nice

still don’t really understand how some people have trouble just being nice

Oh my gosh you’re such a good person. Hey everybody come look at how much of a good person this is.

i literally cannot comprehend how you got offended by this but thanks for proving my point anyway

Can someone put this one in on the reverse? with the ‘no fear –> Be Kind to each other –> one fear’?

The original comic was about Simpsons porn?

This is possibly the most tumblr-y tumblr post I’ve ever seen.

@hellsite-hall-of-fame

is 30s too late for a career change how to change careers how to become evil sorcerer evil sorcerer salaries evil sorceror indeed dot com

we all have that one homie whose aphorisms are superficially witty but lack a certain intellectual verve

post nut clarity does not properly convey the gravity of the pre nut insanity. like truly.

i love how bad he is at using that pen i’m so obsessed