☆It's Raining Somewhere Else☆

Spiritually my spirit is always smoking a cigarette but physically i am.not because hashatg smoking kills

if i dont respond to a message from you i can basically guarantee its not because i dislike you. im just getting attacked by imps and shit all the time genuinely.

I got a job at a gas station across from a casino and a guy keeps coming in to buy whole cartons of cigarettes and talks in the third person calling himself "snake eyes pete" and every time I tell him his total hes like "tell ya what if old Pete rolls a snake eyes why dont you give it to him for free?" and he rolls the same set of loaded dice on the counter and it does not matter how many times he rolls snake eyes I will not give him the cartons for free he gets so mad

going with the flow in a face down in a river kinda way

i know your not supposed to but i do love swiping up gnomes through the window as your drive past them. they giggle and shit its so funny. if you grab the hat just right you dont even gotta slow down

they giggle and what

AND SHIT

deadbeat group chat member

one time i was having sex and i was going “i’m yours i’m yours i’m yours” and then my partner stopped all of a sudden and said “can we talk about new kinks before we introduce them during sex” and i was like yeah what but it turned out she thought i was saying im a horse im a horse im a horse