hiya!!!

luffy: watched multiple people stand on coracles (search up plastic versions or "how hard is it to balance on a coracle?" and you'll get why that's a disaster) and wanted to join in on the fun, knowing damn well i still had glasses on. immediately fell off while clutching my glasses, exclaimed i was fine, and then took a while to get back on my coracle with the help of two people. the next year, i got the hang of it and led a coracle onslaught against a poor canoe crew because i wanted to and we had a splash war. fun times!

nami: did a really meaningful interview for my theatre program (which i love dearly!). at the end of it, when they asked me and the guy i was partnered with about anything else we wanted to say, i did a beautiful speech about giving the program just one chance because it would be unforgettable and the most wonderful experience of your life... and then went "also, money pls?" with a pouty face and begging hands. mind you, my theatre teacher then just had to tell the film crew that i do this a lot. she just had to bring up our summer trip last year where i went swinging from like 12-15 feet up in the trees and instead of acting nonchalant, i screamed "PLEASE GIVE [insert theatre name] MONEY PLEASE GIVE US MONEY!" to the rest of the camp. yeah. i did an ad from the air.

zoro: have done my kickboxing classes with a strained back shoulder thing and fully let the teacher scold me for "slacking" bc i just awkwardly accepted that he didn't hear me tell him that. also did that class once with a sprained left wrist and fully accepted I'd just be grimacing my way through jabs.

usopp: once saved a handball pe game by blocking the ball multiple times with inventive techniques... that included my face. my team won our tournament in the end but to what cost of my poor sore nose? and it gets worse. i am a constant glasses wearer. you know, and i know, and every one of us wearing glasses knows there was an indent as well for the rest of my classes. i lied i was fine but like... OW.

sanji: once emptied out my family's spaghetti stash all by myself because every time i was alone, i would get hungry and bored and eventually got over my worry that i wasn't splitting anything evenly with my brother or my parents. i tested so many recipes. some were awful (do not put sesame oil in without spoons or holding yourself back) and some were incredible even if basic. i love my pasta in tomato sauce with brown butter and gochujang. also, never added oregano despite it being in my house. i guess i forgot it existed.

chopper: once got so into a game of capture the flag as a kid that i just genuinely ran around saving everyone i could and then cried when people did dramatic sacrifices and got thrown in jail. i was a very emotional and dramatic little 9 year old. also, we were in color teams so you can imagine how much funnier the image gets.

crewmate spoilers for opla only fans!

1, the classical no homo way. sanji is saying it because he claims he has a larger dick than zoro.

2, the zosan way. sanji is saying it because he is a shameless size queen who accepted bisexuality in the live action and wants zoro to get that.

broooooo, the idea of some evil employee taking the lead to live vicariously through this poor kid and nosaka forced into the backseat and nishikage the only one who notices... yesssss.

and now i have an urge to rewrite the whole thing but where it's yuri with Athena and Eve (the female cast and a bit of the guys like Evan and Arturo - maybe just everyone except Jared Leto - carried). i mean, athena experiencing the rain felt more real than ares. also, ares seemed more teenage feeling despite the fully grown man playing him. that could be purposeful bc of the whole "robot experiences emotions for the first time" concept but his actions were just so unbelievably teenager like despite the adult energy.

i think the storyline would be cooler if we went like this:

Eve, weighed down by the death of her older sister, is trying to carry out her footsteps.

Athena, a program already training her successors - Ares!! - and knowing she'll eventually fade, is trying to be the best she can be.

They collide the same way the movie works (crazy fight scene and all) but the 29 minutes being up looks awful with Athena collapsing and holding her kid apprentice up.

Eve and Athena have a reluctant bond in the Grid about legacy, especially after Athena brings up Tess as an example of a fading light and trying to understand why Eve's still carrying on the style of thinking that should be null when she's succeeding in games. Ares sees this and with my reimagining him as an Azula type character (prodigal young adult or teen even crashes and burns. no more Jared Leto!!!), he argues with his mentor and gets set up against her. When they escape, it's more of two women bonding over the heavy weight of legacy in the tech industry and building romantic tension and Seth enthusiastically wing manning his serious best friend to get the serious robot lady all Gen Z Tron gaming fans would love with thumbs up in the back instead of the weird third wheeling and Jared Leto creepily flirting with personal data digging.

the movie would be the same except it's a distraught program with the body of a soldier but the mind of a child going berserk over losing the thing he thought he was made for instead of using a black woman randomly going hysterical over her lost purpose to be the end villain instead of the white guy. also, we're not killing ares off bc why would you make the war weapon raised to be a war weapon murder the other war weapon?? or at least let athena wound ares so fatally that nothing works to heal him? i feel like that defeats the purpose of the learning to be human arc.

so Eve gets a bigger role (no more damsel in distress! she gets her badassery back!) in working with Seth and Ajay to run the poor kid back to a particle thing and save him. that changes his mind or at least gives him a debt. the two robots decide to still go around the world but Athena always holds a smaller particle laser to keep them safe. and the movie ends the same with an opening to a sequel.

BC THOSE TWO TOGETHER WOULD BE TOXIC AF AND MAKE FOR A GREAT COMPHET ANGST PLOT IN A BAKUDEKU AND TOGACHAKO FIC!!!!!

like c'mon now bakubro you acknowledge her as a rival and she's a smiling brunette with a special feature on her cheeks with a bit of recklessness in battle and a tendency to go passionately crazy when she cares about something deeply but can also be a crybaby at times??? woahhhhh wonder who fits that... couldn't possibly be your childhood friend turned bully victim and rage outlet turned rival and complicated friendship could it??? you couldn't possibly be trying to find him in her now huh? oh no you just like the girl that acts like him and has said she's inspired by him before. uh-huh. okay.

and wow, look at you, ochako. "falling" for the blonde with spiky/messy hair, who's really into violence and has quite the deranged but soft grin at times. couldn't help but also notice he's (at least surface level observation which would be perfect for this fic) very open about what he likes and beating up people. agility and superficially a slim waist too huh. ohhh girliepop you sure you ain't longing for a certain murderous vampire you ended up considering the cutest girl in the world huh??? no projecting her traits onto him right?? nah you just like tough "bad boys". no bad girls for you. sureeeee

like they would absolutely be looking for other people in each other, no matter if it's a FWB shitty hookup scenario or a full fledged "let's date" thing. and the idea of izuku and himiko watching this and pretending they aren't jealous when they are or perhaps not noticing the two hang out with them respectively more than they do with each other... muah. chef's kiss.

Tobey Maguire's Peter and Wade Wilson are colleagues in the same wackass heroism job.

and Andrew Garfield's Peter and Wade Wilson are absolutely fucking.

in conclusion...

basically the canon thing (at least i think it was canon and said on a livestream) is that Ruth only wears her headgear because she thinks it'll stop Max from attacking her physically, knowing he's middle class and won't exactly like medical bills and something he could clearly get charged and caught for or at least something similar to that.

but what if her dentist decides, "no Ruth you cannot keep wearing the expensive headgear, you have retainers now and it's custom fitted to keep exerting force, meaning you might actually go backwards in your progress."? yes yes bullshit medical thing but like... what if?

and obviously Ruth takes it off bc "holy fucking shit i am not going through the pain of tightening things AGAIN even with max around" and also "damn my parents actually sort of give a shit about my health even if it's for the money saving reasons and they're definitely going to be pissed if they have to pay for braces AGAIN"

so when she comes back into senior year, she's basically looking like Emma Perkins or a scrawnier and curly haired version of Linda Monroe (just lauren roles basically). and those two are smoking hot in some way since Linda is mother and a Honey Queen winner and Emma can be mistaken as a Latte Hotte. ruth's pretty now.

which leads to max. ofc max has a nerdy type. and ofc he's wondering why the new hottie on the block seems to be avoiding him and hanging out with spankoffski and lipschitz of all people. as spoken, he's totally into the unapproachable type ("there's only one out of reach, her name is chasity - it's a wound i can help her bandage!") even if Ruth has no idea she's freaking doing it.

but when Steph gets Pete to meet her at Pasqualli's, instead of Max beating the shit out of him (still threatens to and insults him cruelly duh), they make a weird ass deal that if Pete can get the "new girl" to go on a date with Max by next week, Pete gets to meet up with Steph. He'll let this meeting slide but once the deal is set, Pete's on a deadline to get his ass beat.

so instead of the Waylon prank, it is basically like those teen movies with bets to win except max fucked up with his bet and the nerds + Steph + maybe Grace (girl is trying to throw him at someone else to get rid of her lust) + maybe the jocks (they realize Ruth is freaky but normal and are desperately trying to use her to get back normal teen ways of living and dating) are abusing it to try and get him to be a good person.

and so through the power of dates, teenage horniness, and maybe a witchy intervention (holloway diner dates duh!!), Ruth is serving and using cunt to try and reeducate a bully on why bullying is bad and how to not treat woman like shit unless with consent and in a bed.