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annoying when shows set in the medieval period have the women with thier hair just long and unstyled and out . girl go put on your wimple girl đ¤Śââď¸
like there are so many fun medieval hair and headgear options, it's so boring just seeing loose beachy waves meant to appeal to 21st century beauty standards
put that hot prince in a gay little hood with an ostrich feather or so help me god
So in my continued spiral down into the pits of fiber madness, I have started dyeing yarn.
Because I am Like This, what really tickles my fancy is specifically natural dye. Why? Because there's an element of adventure to it. It requires me to grub around in the ditch after goldenrod and crawl down into a creek bed after reed plumes. When you're doing it, what's gonna come out of the dye pot? The weather the plants grew in and the soil conditions affect things! It's neat!
This is great for the bajillion million squillion plants on this planet that will dye stuff yellow. I have hard tap water so madder root behaves like an absolute dream. There's black walnuts everywhere around here so tasty browns are no problem. I've got a gallon pickle jar of iron bits in vinegar to sadden those colors to olive greens and various grays.
However I am now running into the same thing humanity has run into for 10,000 years when dyeing with natural stuff; blue. Which comes from indigo or woad, of course. That's fine.
But more specifically, why is the simplest method for making indigo play nice a bucket of piss. YES THERE ARE OTHER METHODS BUT THE SIMPLEST AND TIME TESTED ONE IS A PISS BUCKET.
Indigo and woad contain the same dye compounds. They are, chemically speaking, complicated. The blue dye of indigo is the result of indigotin. Indigotin is insoluable in water and won't bind to shit. In the plant you will not find indigotin, though. You will find indican, which is colorless, water soluable, and loves to bind to anything it can touch. Wool. Cotton. Linen. Hands. Wood. Plastic. Whatever.
Indigo is usually sold in cakes of the extracted pigment, and has been for centuries. Woad was normally sold in balls, which are made by pulping the leaves, rolling them into balls, and letting them dry. To dye with either of these, you have to force the indigotin to break back down into indican. You have to do this by putting them in a room temp vat of something alkaline and removing oxygen. Under these conditions the indigotin will revert to indican and you can dye with it.
There are many ways to do this. Most of these methods are precise, complicated, and involve fucking around with precise amounts of fructose and yeast and calcium hydroxide or washing soda or a color remover/oxegen reducer known as thiourea dioxide. Humans are remarkably clever inventive little apes who love color and we've figured out many methods over the thousands of years we've been using indigo and woad.
However.
The simplest method? The very easiest that like never fails? Is to get a bucket of piss and let it go stale. Piss is alkaline, and has bacteria in it that remove oxygen. You get a bucket of piss, you add indigo or woad, and then you wait a bit for the indigotin to dissolve and you can dye the most heartbreakingly beautiful blues. And emerald greens and purples by overdyeing yellow or red.
Every other method humans have come up with to use indigo or woad are basically us trying to get around the Piss Bucket.
And yet, the Piss Bucket still remains undefeated as the simplest and most foolproof method.
Indigo, incidentally, is so gorgeous, lasting, and perfect a blue that even in modern days, we can't improve on it. We can synthesize the indigotin molecule, but we cannot improve on it.
Your modern jeans? Still dyed with indigo, though it's synthetically produced indigotin rather than derived from the indigo plant. But they still have to set up a fucking massive and tightly monitored and controlled indigo reduction vat to dye jeans.
i feel like we don't talk enough about the County-Palatinate of Durham
like
i feel like at some point in general english history education people should at least touch on the theocratic city-state where the bishops had rights otherwise unique to the monarch UNTIL 1836????
WE HAD OUR OWN MINI-VATICAN SITUATION IN ENGLAND LESS THAN TWO HUNDRED YEARS AGO AND NOBODY OUTSIDE COUNTY DURHAM EVER SEEMS TO KNOW THAT.
like they weren't TAXED they were sitting in the middle of the wool trade (up until the bottom fell out of the english wool trade in the 16th century) and the coal trade and they were EXEMPT FROM NATIONAL TAX COLLECTIONS
they had their own courts! they had their own judges! they had their own militias to call up independent of the Crown! they had their own maritime court as well, so they had their own naval and port authority! they had their own customs and excise!
i need everyone to understand how fucking wild the county-palatinate of durham is as a concept this just EXISTED for hundreds of years and nobody seems to know about it
last unhinged county-palatinate post of the night i swear but
this, on reflection, makes it both way weirder and slightly more explicable that 90% of england straight-up does not know county durham exists, or goes "oh, is that in ireland?"
it also kind of makes sense of why county durham is like. the only english county with that "county [name]" structure? because it's only been county durham since it ceased being the county-palatinate of durham. and was never included in the shire system because it was busy being basically a vassal kingdom.
#county durham#I have to wonder how much of this was that some tax collector took one look at that hill and that insane river#(which is actually very shallow but that's not obvious)#and decided âfuck that#leave them to itâ
OH NO YOU ACTIVATED MY TRAP CARD i know this is a joke but also i do actually know why the county-palatine started
and it's not about the geography but it is very much "fuck that, leave them to it"
TIME FOR AN EVEN MORE UNHINGED HISTORY RAMBLE
the County-Palatinate of Durham was actually a liberty (i.e. a region with special governance privileges) before it was English - it started as the terrritory of St Cuthbert in 684, under the Kingdom of Northumbria. now, at that point, it wasn't actually in Durham. it was in Lindisfarne, which is a lot less of a geographic block and a lot more difficult to administrate (on account of being an island half of the time), and it was developed as a liberty for a few reasons:
it was a crucial meeting-point for convocations between the Celtic and Roman churches, as well as for various British churches;
it was out of the way, and had few natural resources, so it was a good way to appease the church without actually costing much;
Saint (then Bishop) Cuthbert was scary.
the first time Northumbria fell apart, the Community of St Cuthbert saw an opportunity and majorly increased its territories. at this point it was not basically independent, it was independent - it was a theocratic polity in a region where a whole bunch of polities were fighting over scraps.
when the Danes finally reunified Northumbria, there was a big ethnic split between the Anglian north (in modern terms, roughly Northumberland and Cumbria) and Danish York. they were all officially in the Danelaw (i.e. under Danish/"Viking" rule), but there were big regional beefs going on. King Guthred of Northumbria sees an opportunity to bring the Community of St Cuthbert to his side and simultaneously create a peaceful buffer between the Angles and the Danes, so he grants the land between the Tyne and Wear to the Bishops of Lindisfarne as a patrimony. governance looks very different at this point in time, it's not a liberty yet, but County Durham basically comes into existence then (around the mid 9th century) and already know they are Important.
(now, as anyone raised in the region was definitely told at primary school, is when the Viking raids on Lindisfarne drive the Community of St Cuthbert inland, first to Chester-le-Street and then to Durham. the corpse of st cuthbert is dug up and found to be fresh as a daisy. a seasick monk accidentally drops 1/4 of the most beautiful and celebrated illuminated gospels overboard on the way over, they start building a cool cathedral, etc and so forth. The abbey at Lindisfarne remains part of the Patrimony of St Cuthbert for now, but the administrative centre moves to mainland Durham.)
FAST FORWARD ANOTHER 200 YEARS. northumbria has lost a lot of power, and is now an earldom rather than a kingdom, largely autonomous but answerable to the saxon kings at winchester. the earl of northumbria, Tostig Godwinson, who happens to be the cousin of the king of england, makes the worst decision in the history of all the bad decisions in northumbria. he calls up the king of norway and is like "hey do you want england? you can have england if we can have northumbria's independence back." said king, one Harald Hardrada, is like "hell yeah i love trying to claim thrones unsuccessfully, it didn't work when i did it to Denmark but it'll work now!" and marches northumbrian troops down to stanford bridge where he gets his shit absolutely rocked by Harold Godwinson, who then has to quick-march to the english channel to get his shit rocked at Hastings (largely because his entire army was exhausted from rushing 185 miles to try and catch William of Normandy when he landed)
so what i'm saying is: norman conquest happened!
*deep breath* speed round
Tostig died at Stamford Bridge, so the earldom's vacant! William taps a Northumbrian lord who has accepted his rule, hey, new earl. new earl immediately gets murdered by his brother, who rises up against the Normans. he gets ousted by the Normans and replaced by a new new pro-Norman earl. new new earl immediately rises up against the Normans. William puts down the rebellion, puts a Norman earl in Northumbria. within a year, the new new new earl gets murdered and Northumbria rises up again. William says "fuck this, time for a mass slaughter". hey! it's the Harrying of the North! we have killed allegedly 100,000 people! this is a Norman area now!
1075: William sells the earldom to the Bishop of Durham (Bishop Walcher), unifying the temporal powers of the earldom with the religious powers of the Patrimony of St Cuthbert. Most people consider Walcher to be the first true Prince-Bishop of Durham.
1080: Bishop Walcher gets murdered by a bunch of native Northumbrians. chaos ensues.
now, obviously Walcher didn't have legitimate offspring. he was a bishop and the Reformation hadn't happened yet. so the Earldom he had bought from William just kind of... the only natural inheritor is the next Bishop of Durham?
Technically, this does not happen. Technically, the Earldom is abolished, William gives up on the whole project of incorporating Northumbria as a whole, and he divides it into (roughly) the current counties.
at this point, County Durham does not exist yet, it's officially part of Northumberland. but you cannot tell this to the Bishops of Durham. for about 200 years there's this standoff where they just dispute the authority of the sheriffs of Northumberland at every turn. because, like, they bought that title. it's not just that they're good noble churchmen and you should respect their authority: the Bishops of Durham (in the person of Bishop Walcher) paid a lot of money for the Earldom of Northumbria, and they didn't do anything to piss off the King (in fact they sided with him despite him being responsible for another sacking of Church lands in the area), and he can't just take away the title without a reason. so they think they're in charge, northumberland thinks it's in charge, and the Kings of England are tired of dealing with the whole mess north of York so they're not touching that shit
so it goes until the late 12th century, when the bishops make another big purchase and buy Sadberge (the area around Stockton, Coniscliffe, and Gainford - Barnard Castle is on the edge of Sadberge, which I think is why it stayed disputed?), which was already a liberty because of OTHER complicated reasons involving Scotland taking it, giving it special rights, and then losing it back to England. so now the church in Durham has two titles which they will argue give them control in the region. but also officially they're still under Northumberland.
our last stop is at 1293, at which point there is an incident where the justices of Northumberland call the Bishop of Durham to court, and he just fully refuses to go. he holes up in Durham and like. what are you going to do? storm a cathedral and arrest the bishop? have another thomas beckett situation? hell no. the justices escalate the issue to Parliament (which exists now) and the Crown. the Bishop of Durham rocks up to Parliament and is like "hey everyone knows this is OUR jurisdiction tell these justices to fuck off."
(actually, he says that "from time immemorial it had been widely known that the sheriff of Northumberland was not sheriff of Durham nor entered within that liberty as sheriff", which is a bold claim when the sheriff of Northumberland had only existed for like 200 years which is not that immemorial ANYWAY)
and Parliament seems to have just shrugged and gone "you know what, sure". and that's how you end up with the full-blown County-Palatine enshrined in law by the start of the 14th century.
so
uh
basically i think it really is just like "oh my god if we give you the special rights and privileges will you all chill the fuck out?", and, to be fair: it does seem to have worked.
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It was cocky and overconfident to call the Titanic "unsinkable" but one thing that's overlooked is that she was genuinely really, unusually solid. She could float even with 4 compartments fully flooded, which even a lot of modern day ships can't do.
And it's not like they were wrong about her being solid! Olympic, her identical sister ship, survived being torpedoed and then running over the U-Boat that fired that torpedo. Those ships were solid.
It's very clear that absolutely no other ship in 1912 would have been able to survive that collision, and it's a testament to the quality of the ship that she didn't sink in a few minutes Empress of Ireland style. Part of what makes the Titanic such a tragic story is that it isn't a group of rich idiots locking themselves in a shoddy iron barrel to go 4km underwater. It was 2200 people, most of whom were poor immigrants, on a reliable ship on a commonly-made journey, and then something went horribly, unpredictably wrong.
#also the White Star Line never billed Titanic as unsinkable #the media kind of did though most of that was posthumous #but she was NOT officially advertised that way#and before anyone mentions the lifeboat thing: #it's a myth that lifeboats were removed for aesthetic reasons #and Titanic had WAY more lifeboats than was required or expected at the time #in a design environment where lifeboats were seen as deathtraps significantly less safe than staying with the extremely well-designed snip #titanic isn't a story of carelessness #no expense was spared on safety #and oh my god they did not lock third-class passengers in to die on purpose that is a movie it is fake (via @mylordshesacactus)
There WERE gates seperating third class from the rest of the boat, but those gates were. Literally just waist high fences. They were just there to mark 'hey you're not allowed past here' in universal language, and that was it. It was physically impossible to trap third class passengers in the ship.
What DID happen with a lot of third class passengers was just a case of really unfortunate circumstances - they had the worst steward to passenger ratio, they were the furthest down in the ship, AND they had the widest diversity of languages, giving them the least time to get out, and the worst communication barriers. And even then, y'know what many surviving third class passengers reported?
People did not evacuate third class. They knew the ship was sinking, and they stayed put, because of an overwhelming amount of learned helplessness - for the majority of these people, their lives had NEVER been their own, they were always in the hands of greater powers. So they stayed put, they waited to be ordered to leave, and when those orders never came... they died. Which is fucking awful, but... yeah, not really a design flaw; just the nature of the tragedy.
Anyways, all that aside, I also hate it when people smugly talk about how mOrE LiFeBoAtS would have saved more people, like. Dude, holy shit, the Titanic actually sank EXTREMELY fast, boats that size normally took the better part of a day to sink, she was gone in about two hours. More lifeboats wouldn't have done anything. They didn't even have enough time to launch all the lifeboats they did have - Collapsible A was launched with the sides still down, so all passengers were sitting in ankle deep water all night, meanwhile Collapsible B was never launched at all - it was swept overboard and wound up upside down in the water (with the one surviving radio operator, Harold Bride trapped underneath). The survivors on Collapsible B were mainly men, who managed to climb on top of it, and under the command of Third Officer Lightoller (highest ranked survivor), the men standing on the overturned boat kept it balanced and floating all night, while towing more survivors in the water.
This obviously had high casualty rates, but one of the survivors they towed in the water was the ships head baker Charles Joughin, the final person to leave the Titanic, as he managed to climb up to the top of the stern as it tipped, and calmly rode it down like an elevator while people were panicking and jumping; Joughin didn't even get his hair wet (the Titanic movie also lied about the ship 'sucking people down with it' btw). Joughin also spent the entire sinking drinking heavily, which probably helped him stay calm, and when he was rescued his only health concerns were mild frostbite in his feet, and a raging hangover, god bless.
Anyways as for the lifeboats not being fully loaded, that WAS a mistake, but not the crews fault - that was STANDARD PROCEDURE in the day, lifeboats were NOT meant to be fully loaded while still in the air, you were supposed to put some people in, send them down, the load the rest in the water; loading them in the air would cause their hulls to break from the weight. Now, the lifeboats on the Titanic DID have reinforced hulls, so they actually could be fully loaded in the air, which had held up in testing... but the crew and officers had NOT been informed of that fact. When they were launching full lifeboats near the end, Lightoller's admitted in his inquiry testimony that it was an extremely reckless choice being made out of desperation.
Anyways, if you are also a nerd and want to know how the Titanic sinking actually went down first hand, why not get it right from the primary sources? There was a US Senate Inquiry that began literally the day after the Carpathia arrived in New York, the British held their own inquiry later, and the full transcripts of both can be found here. Extremely interesting stuff - during Gugliemo Marconi's testinmony on the first day, you can literally see the inquiry realizing in real time that hey, why the FUCK isn't it mandatory for ships to have someone at the radio at all times in case of emergency? Really neat stuff.
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Food history has been so sanitized by the demonization of carbs. âOur ancestors only had fruits and veggies they didnât have all these refined carbsâ our ancestors drank beer 25/8 because the water was bad. Our ancestors drizzled honey on shit ever since we knew it existed. Weâve been making bread for our entire recorded history. Itâs true that bleached sugars specifically are a new thing but high glycemic carbs are not new at all, weâve been consuming them for thousands of years
People drank beer & fruit wine 25/8 because it was high in calories and also tasty and pretty cheap/easy to make in bulk.
IT WAS NOT USED TO REPLACE OR SANITIZE WATER! THEIR WATER WAS NOT BAD!
The alcohol content in beer/wine back then was too low to actually sanitize anything effectively, and beer/wine only lasts for 6 months (usually less) even while still sealed in a cask, due to oxidization. Oxidation turns fermented liquids into vinegar. Wine and beer wasnât meant for long-term storage.
This is great, because vinegar is the great preserver! VINEGAR is what people used to store their foods long-term, along with SALT and DRYING and SMOKING.
âPicklingâ can be done with pure vinegar if you donât have any expensive salt around, and vinegar can be made by fermenting any fruit or grain with wild yeast! If youâre lucky, you can also get wine/beer treats out of it on the way.
Circling back around: beer/wine was NEVER a replacement for water. Humans have been drinking from ground springs, wells, rainwater, and clear running water since our ape ancestors got the instinct to avoid stagnant pools.
If you didnât have immediate access to a source of clean water, you didnât fucking build a town there!
Thatâs a big reason why, WORLDWIDE, settlements are ALL historically clustered around sources of water like springs, wells, and rivers. (Or utilized rainwater catchment & storage) And why âthe town well is poisoned/dried up!â Is a huge and terrible thing that comes up in a ton of old stories. Losing your source of freshwater means everyone has to move somewhere else, or die.
Even in huge cities, youâd be surprised at how sophisticated freshwater delivery systems were in the middle-ages. London had the âgreat conduit.â - a man-made, underground channel that moved water directly from a freshwater spring to fill a water tank in the Cheapside marketplace, accessible to the public. This conduit was built in 1245.
Mesopotamians in the BRONZE AGE built clay pipes for sewage removal, and other pipes for rain water collection, and wells. In 4,000 BC.
Building Aqueducts to move spring water into towns was first attributed to the Minoans, who lived in 2,000 BC.
Sanskrit texts from 2,000 BC also detail how to purify water youâre not sure about: expose it to Sunlight, filter it through Charcoal, dip a piece of copper in it at least 7 times, and filter it again. (UV treatment kills bacteria, Charcoal catches many poisons and heavy metal, copper is also antibacterial) <- even if they didnât know what germs were, prehistoric humans were great at recognizing patterns, and noticing when people DIDNT die.
Persians in 700 BC used âqanatâ, or tunnels dug into hillsides to let gravity move (CLEAN!) groundwater to nearby towns + for agriculture irrigation. Qanats were still the main water supply for the entire Iranian capitol city until about 1933.
The Roman Empire (312 BC) also built aqueducts to move spring and groundwater across miles and miles.
The Incas (1450) built wondrous examples of hydraulic engineering. Their âstairway of fountainsâ supplied the entire city of Machu Picchu with fresh spring water from a pair of rain-fed springs atop the mountain. The fountain canals could carry about 80 gallons a minute.
Getting clean drinking water was just not an issue for normal people in MOST long-term settlements. They may not understand germ theory, but they knew clean water was important and would kick up a BIG fuss if those water sources were sabotaged.
In conclusion: people absolutely drank beer and wine with breakfast. They also drank water. It was not a replacement.
In many cultures, there were weak beers. They had names like small beer â they were specifically beers that had low alcohol because people knew that beer got you drunk and if you watered it down or re-brewed using previously used hops or barley or whatever, then you would get a beer that wouldnât get you drunk.
Same with wines: there was get you drunk wine, and there was wind that you could drink a lot of. They were also cordial made by concentrating fruit juice, or historical drinks like Posca.
As far back is the Babylonian Empire they were making pastries out of dates and pistachios and flour.
Previous to that they probably were as well, but we donât have any written records of it.
Literally as soon as somebody figured out that you could smash some high fat, high carb, high sugar stuffed together and bake it into something resembling cookies, they absolutely did.
So you should go and eat a cookie, because all of your ancestors spent a lot of time arranging the situation of civilisation to make sure that cookies were available. And if you donât eat one then theyâre going to be very sad
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