like a fish on a skewer

did you google how to take a screen shot

my partner doesn’t use pet names nearly as much as i do, which is very funny because i will crack my gay little knuckles and say some shit like “good morning my sun and moon, my loveliest boy, my baby my sweetheart my darling dearest” and he will reply “hello adrian”

the style of writing is not the problem, not the genre, not the subject matter, not even the words themselves. the SINGLE defining issue with the “Tumblr Prose” style i was trying to tackle is that it’s front loaded with imagery and metaphor and completely lacking in sense, reason, symmetry, motion, conveying information. i agree that plenty of writing can sound good and feel good to read when it’s all metaphor and visceral images but it needs to have a baseline that can carry it through or else the tail wags the dog and it’s all cool “quotable” lines and no substance, nothing to read between the lines, no character

I'm imagining a world where RPGMaker somehow made it as the de facto codebase for software and you have to navigate your banking app by walking around in a huge room full of NPCs named "make deposit" and "make withdrawal" etc and there's loud as fuck stock music playing

I said “beatboxing puppy” on a call with my boyfriend and he responded “NOO DONT PUT ME IN AN UNSKIPPABLE CUTSCENE”

gotta love people immediately backpedaling when they realise that there are Consequences To Being Mean

I genuinely believe that part of why it has become so normalized to be openly callous and evil in politics is that customer service culture has trained affluent people that they can treat everyone they consider beneath them however they want and still be treated kindly.

"Regulations don't exist because governments enjoy them" is an important statement here. The government has to spend money and labor to enforce regulations. The government has to be begged for years and sometimes threatened by the American people into even creating the regulations. The people with the money want you to believe regulations are "BIG GOVERNMENT INFRINGING ON OUR FREEDOMS" so you'll help them undo the regulations your grandparents had to force that same government to install in the first fucking place. They count on you being ignorant of the past so they can make another round of dirty money by poisoning you all over again.

Whenever I hear "cutting red tape" I think of food inspections and water runoff rules. Whenever I hear someone complain that it's not fair, how they can't compete as a business with all these "unnecessary" regulations, I think of the safety guards on various industrial machines I've worked. "It's not fair that I could be making so much more money if I was allowed to lie cheat steal and harm the public" is not actually a winning take, and yet

they got married btw

In 2026, the chicest thing a gay actor can do is never explicitly come out as gay but also make it abundantly clear that he is. Coming out is too modern. Staying closeted is too old fashioned. But this method merges contemporary freedom with Old Hollywood glamour and allure, and it weeds out the dumbest people who truly don’t get it. I call it the Pascal Method.

Taylor Swift does this

no she doesn’t

You clearly don't go here or to queer history and signaling, or both, enough to have this conversation and I'm not going to explain it to you. You could have asked questions, you could have done even a modicum of research. You didn't and you made yourself look ignorant. Goodbye.

Chickens love to peck at hard things to make a variety of interesting sounds and my new ladies have just discovered The Tin Fence.

They're also a big fan of Chipped Ceramic Plate if you feel like experimenting

Ooh I have some leftover floor tile fragments, I should give them some of those.

I've seen people give their chooks kids you xylophones and they love them!!

Mine are a big fan of sealed plastic bucket of water sealant paint that we haven't moved yet.

My old hens loved Window and every day I feel blessed that my new ones haven't discovered it yet.

Mine have an old mirror, parrot toy with tiny bell, metal toy pan. All of these things make fun sounds when pecked 👍

I should get them a wind chime

Idk you may quickly regret Wind Chime

I regret my chickens every day

TIL any chicken coop can be an entire all-percussion orchestra bangin out the tunes

there’s a friday ass vibe about this wednesday boys keep your wits about you