"Well, shit."

cannot fucking believe how many notes this has and continues to get

i’ll literally never have enough of that dylan b hollis dude cause like. hes a college student who just.,.blew up on tiktok. he has the soul of a man who has lived for 60 years in the body of a twink. he cooks and is surprised every single time. he goes CINAMIN everytime he uses cinnamon. he has the kitchen of a 60s house wife and cooks like hes going to kill someone

- Floof powder

F I R E

“I’m going to assume we have the same size package, although the last time I assumed that I wound up stunned and quite self-conscious.”

“Nothing says the holidays like AMBIGUOUS MEAT!”

like i’m picturing him being really careful and looking at it and carrying it exactly like this while walking or riding through the woods and across rivers and up mountains and through valleys and he doesn’t drop it even once except at the very end where he tidily drops it into the volcano. frodo sam and the crew and even gollum wholly undisturbed. sauron can’t find him bc of the meditative aura surrounding him which is generated by his immense focus on not dropping it

World's most tense egg and spoon race

I hate it when you’re reading smut and you can’t figure out what position they’re in.

ITS BACK

just learned that magnolias are so old that they’re pollinated by beetles because they existed before bees

They existed *before beetles*

Why is this sad? Why am I sad?

She looks kinda nervous. She's surprisingly tall. She's got looong socks. She's just like me.

I saw on insta this morning a reel of a woman who's been hosting a dinner party for friends for the past two years show snap shots of the parties each month for the last year. and I'm interested in that in general, I'd like to start hosting more. so I go into the comments and there are just some rank ass ppl saying things like "oh so you're rich rich" and "some of us don't have money." Is it fun living so miserably?

maybe im too broke but if you can afford to host a dinner party every month thats fucking rich, unless you're hosting a potluck, dinner parties are fucking expensive

okay so what?

so what? not everyone has the fucking means to throw fancy ass dinner parties constantly, some of us are fuckin suffering.

yeah but like why is that relevant to someone posting their dinner party. it has nothing to do with you.

you're the one criticizing poor folks for being irritated that the rich can flaunt their wealth for everyone to see constantly. if you wanna have a nice thing with friends thats fine but its for a group chat, not the public internet. rich folks need to quit showing off.

wow you really do think the world is about you. well good luck with that

maybe if you stopped to acknowledge that its not a politically neurotypical act to flaunt wealth youd understand the irritation towards people who make it impossible to exist as a impoverished person without being reminded of how privelaged people will always have more thsn you.

no <3

Hang on, can we talk about "politically neurotypical" for a sec?

Yeah this need for people to be constantly performing miserable poverty and scraping for gruel off the rocky ground while wearing grey hemp and bemoaning your lot in life lest you get labeled An Enemy Of The Grand Cause is not taking us anywhere good

I EXPECTED SO MUCH LESS THAN WHAT I GAINED

OH MY GOD I CANT BELIEVE I FORGOT THAT TIME THE MAIN CHARACTER GOT A PIRATE SHIP MADE OUT OF CRABS

HUH.

i don't know how much more clearer i can make it. he has a pirate ship. that is made out of crabs

sweet, might base an agricultural civilisation on this river, hope it behaves itself

might just fuck around and find out

Diversity win! This river has ADHD

I took two semesters of Chinese history in college. The first thing the professor started with was “getting to know the rivers, Yangtze and the Yellow Rivers. You need to know them because they will play very important roles in the history of China. The Yangtze has been crucial to trade, movement, culture and more. The Yellow river, the Yellow River can’t be trusted as you will repeatedly see.”

If you got stuck on a question during a test or whatever you could start with “the Yellow river jumped the banks causing instability and chaos that quickly spread” and would be correct more times than you would be incorrect.

This stupid exchange between friends has become a cultural icon.