Phoenix Ashes

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You can find it here: https://wisteriagames.itch.io/twincovesdemo

Thank you for your support, and I hope you enjoy Demo 2.0! It has had quite the overhaul in the last couple years and features all new art, a completely updated script, and is about as twice as long as the original demo. Special shout-out to my patrons and my early access backers!

“How did you get in I didn’t invite you?!” New house owner

"Forgot about wishes, kid. Have I got a deal for you..."

Jesus screamed “JESUS CHRIST YOU STABBED ME”.

Since that Jesus had to be taken down due to a bad case of stab-itis, the backup Jesus came in, but he weighed significantly less than the original Jesus- which would have been fine, except that at the end the cross was supposed to ascend upwards with Jesus on it, and the weights hadn’t been adjusted.

my first year doing this, our industry contacts were 1 actor, 1 casting director, and 1 producer to get different aspects of the business, and they all gave us amazing advice and told fantastic stories. the actor in question was Zazu on Broadway’s The Lion King for several years, and told the best story by far.

in The Lion King, there are only two pieces of pre-recorded noise in the whole show. one, when Pumbaa does a MASSIVE fart while fighting the hyenas, and the other being Mufasa saying REMEMBERRRRRR as Simba climbs Pride Rock. the actor told us while struggling not to laugh that, during one night’s performance, someone forgot to flip the tape of these pre-recorded noises.

so, at the end of the show, the great climax where Simba finally accepts his place in the Circle of Life, the heavens parted and-

PFFFFFFFFFRRRRRBTFTBTBFTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT

everyone froze. and then all ran off stage positively HOWLING with laughter.

Originally, the actors were going to stroll on stage with our Lefou hauling in the really neat (and real!) taxidermied deer head that we had found in a local thrift store. Now, two days before opening night, our director wants Lefou to run in from off stage and catch a stuffed duck that Gaston has just shot. This, of course, requires two things to work properly as a scene: a gunshot noise, and a stuffed duck.

The gunshot noise, we had covered. Blue-collar, redneck school? Guns a plenty to record. The stuffed duck? Harder than you might have thought to obtain.

Three hunting stores, two taxidermists, and one Pet Supply Store ™, I’d finally found a semi-realistic pheasant squeaky toy. What follows is an account of the ways this dog toy managed to be the nightmare prop of the six show run.

Opening Night: The stagehand, who was supposed to drop the bird from the ceiling catwalk, missed his cue and didn’t drop the it. Lefou’s actor rolls with it and does an excellent job of looking around foolishly before getting cuffed upside the head by Gaston. The stagehand then drops the bird squarely on Gaston’s head. Cue laughter.

Saturday Matinee: Different stagehand throws the bird instead of dropping it and beans Lefou directly in the face with the prop. Lefou falls over. Cue laughter.

Saturday Night: Bird is missing during curtain call. Director hauls the deer head down from it’s place on the tavern wall and tells Gaston and Lefou to revert to the old blocking i.e. no gunshot, no bird, just walk in with trophy. During Gaston and Lefou’s conversation, gun shot sound goes off and a stagehand throws the bird onto the stage…from the wrong side of the stage. Lefou and Gaston stare at it in awkward silence for a solid thirty seconds before Lefou makes off-script, subtle joke about Gaston’s gun going off late instead of early. Cue adults in the audience laughing.

Sunday Matinee: Director begs the stagehands to get the cue right at least once. Gunshot and bird prop go off without a hitch. Lefou accidentally catches the prop when it falls from the catwalk. He’s so startled that he caught it that Gaston runs right in to him. They drop both the gun and the bird props, and grab the wrong prop in their scramble. Gaston spends the rest of the scene gesturing dramatically with a stuffed pheasant, instead of a gun.

Sunday Night:  Director is fed up with bird prop, decides that Lefou should just carry bird prop in after gunshot happens off stage. Lefou accidentally squeezes the prop during the intro conversation, startling both actors into silence with the squeaky toy noise - apparently, neither of them realized it was a dog toy.

It was awesome because when people saw the play and didn’t know the girls were identical twins, it literally looked like it was one actor doing multiple, uber fast costume changes.

One of our first performances was for our peers and it was a big school so lots of people didn’t know the twins. This - for some reason - was also the performance they chose to record.

Listening to the confusion of the audience during the playback was fantastic and completely topped by the moment Viola walked off stage left just as Sebastian walked on stage right and someone right beside the camera goes “OH WHAT THE FUCK” so loudly it drowned out everything else.

It’s like our third show and everything has been going surprisingly well. Hook and Smee climb to the top of the “tree trunk”, supposedly looking for Peter and not knowing they’re standing above his hiding spot the whole time.

Turns out someone didn’t close the trapdoor properly, because the second Hook steps on it, he plunges through the thing. He’s able to catch himself, but he’s got his ass and one leg dangling through this hole where it’s like a ten foot drop to the ground. All of us stage crew are literally two feet away from him offstage, just gaping at him because???? Y'all this fall looked BAD. Looked like my dude did the splits in mid air. The whiplash caused his fucking wig to come off. The audience is dead silent, all of us backstage are dead silent, the director is like already looking up how to treat a broken groin.

on said opening night, I’m in the wings stage left per usual, waiting for Nerissa to come offstage. the other dresser for the quick-change is standing next to me. we’re both slightly out of breath from having just done the reverse change and set out the other costume in Efficient Dressing Position™, but we settle in to enjoy the show for a moment

the wardrobe crew chief joins us. we think nothing of this

and then. right in the middle of Portia’s famous “The quality of mercy is not strained” monologue. with the extremely talented actress totally killing it and the audience deathly silent

we hear

“I LIKE BIG DICKS”

time seems to stop. I look at the other dresser. she looks at me. we both turn, horrified, to look at the crew chief- who, for his part, has an expression like he just accidentally shot his own mother

because it turns out, he has accidentally broken the cardinal rule of run crew: Always Put Your Phone On Silent If You Must Carry It With You. that was his text tone

and it went off in the wings not six feet from the first row of seats

The weeks leading up to the performance go off without too much of a hitch. The scene Drama came up with was very sweet— a snap shot of a home and through multiple Christmases. Set up only by two armchairs, and a rickety fake Christmas tree. Every year the dad, played by genuinely the most warm and charismatic guy in drama, takes a present from the tree and gives it to the girl playing the daughter with a little gentle looping flourish as if he’s giving her the entire world in a box, with the girl playing the Mom looking on fondly. So basically you get to watch the girl grow up—which is basically just a transition from her sitting and playing excitedly on the floor like a five year old to a distracted teen and eventually to a calm, sweet adult and the parents get subtlety older, until after one of the transition dims, the father’s chair is empty. It’s just the mother sitting in her chair, looking over at his. Cue the daughter coming into scene with another actor as her husband and a baby (doll, obviously). Mother, now grandmother reaches out, and with a smile the daughter makes the same careful flourish her dad did while handing baby off to grandma. The tenderness in all faces is positively tear jerking already. Daughter and husband leave scene, and by this point the show choir should be at “I’ll be home for Christmas. If only in my dreams.” While they extend it with a round of “In my dreams, in my dreams” Grandma gets up with the baby and goes and sits in the father’s chair as they finish with a forlorn “If only in my dreams”.

It was good. We matched up everything with show choir and were set.

Now, fast forward to a few days before the show: the Christmas tree base is split. No one knows how or why, but a little duct tape and it’s good as new. Last rehearsal, no issues. It’s a little wobbly when we set it out but no issue.