Adele Killed Jenny Schecter

No like ideologically I am against charter schools but if it’s the best option for Sammy it’s where he’s going. Also ideologically against dairy but I give him yogurt in a smoothie every day so

Okay I’m almost done with the Pitt but like free birther getting severe pre-e/HELLP syndrome is the most fucking simperingly obviously plotline of all time.

You know that thing where kids get English accents from Peppa Pig or Australian accents from Bluey? Sammy’s new musical obsession is 80s new wave band Tears for Fears and he will sing along to their songs in an English accent

Unfortunately spinning out about 1:1 iPads and Chromebooks in schools and schools not teaching kids how to read and researching ch*rt*r sch**ls

I told Sammy he could watch 3 episodes of Thomas (they’re like 5 mins) and after the three played he was like “that was three episodes!!!” and asked me to turn it off. Okay honesty king

The dentist office legitimately acted mad at me when I said I wanted a referral to an oral surgeon to get my wisdom teeth out. I am 33 and they are partially erupted and nerve damage is a real concern like sorry I don’t want the GP dentist to do it. Like they actually acted like mean girls it was crazy

I was like two days post partum and we had made some wire mother cloth mother jokes because we had to triple feed so we were like let’s make the bottle feeds (which Kylie was doing) like less cozy and the nursing more cozy even though he wasn’t transferring much (which in retrospect was because of his low tone) and then I was like crying and I was like “actually I’m really sad about the baby monkeys”