life of a girl named Kelsey

There is no downside to this at all

This is the best, because it says A CHILD, not your child, so I could pick one of the really poor kids on the streets and go “Your life is going to change right now”, and I could buy everything their family might need, along with a house, a food supply, toys, clothes, and everything they never had the chance to have before. And the best thing is that I could do this with lots of children, and not just one. I could give a lot of children in need a full week of Christmas basically and maybe give them a chance to have a different life. That would be great.

I’d break the button after hitting it so hard

I got to “Dad” and had to scroll down and reblog for a break because I laughed so hard I nearly threw up twice.

"Killing her seems a bit harsh"

T.G.I.FIBROMYALGIA

No, for real, though—this is a thing.  Not sure about the science behind it, but it makes me feel fancy and powerful regardless.  I highly recommend it.

There actually is legit science behind this. In fact, here’s an entire TED Talk about the science behind it, and the confidence-related chemicals that your brain produces JUST BY YOU STANDING LIKE THIS.

Fucking kids care more about each other than we do

I still love this.

I hope you realize that once the fanfic writers see this, we’re all fucked into oblivion.

i wrote a song about a tortilla

actually its more of a wrap

Popping someone’s bubble of ignorance and forcing them to deal with reality.

That’s actually a really literal description of this gif