Be myself? What kind of garbage advice is that? @parkerslifewreck - Tumblr Blog

He eat a nemon

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3liza

once you reach a certain level of Animal Knowing you become burdened with two absolutely true, completely contradictory facts:

animals are basically the same, a lion is a big kitty

a lion is absolutely not a big kitty, are you fucking stupid?

hasufin

Back when I was in high school, volunteering at the zoo, I had this encounter with one of our mountain lions.

Now, I had actually petted the older, calmer female. But this was one of the males - they'd never been even slightly interested in me. But today? He made eye contact with me. He hunkered down. He did the butt waggle like he was going to pounce. Again. And... POUNCE. That cat crossed a good 20 meters in about 3 seconds. He only turned away at the last moment because there was an electrified fence.

He made sure I knew he was there. He wasn't hunting: he was playing. This was exactly like a housecat playing with you.

But, just because he was playing, didn't mean I wouldn't have been dead if he'd actually pounced on me.

They are big kitties. It's just that housecats are small and can't seriously injure you.

beginning-to-be-happy

Thank you, that was terrifying

whydidisavethistomyphone

bashcrandicoot

Based on a true story

groveofgreen

fung-official

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satan-offical

Teacher: guys this Tumblr post is 36281992 years old and only the long lost Tumblr princess can read it

Me: but teacher, I can read it just fine *starts reading in perfect tumblanese*

satan-offical

Who reblogged this 30 times

satan-offical

Who reblogged this 60 times

wyrmicelli

me tongue-deep in a sandalwood candle: 🤤

the tjmaxx employee loading a fourth tranquilizer dart into their blowgun: i need backup

snowown

lesvegas

passing in public makes me feel like white shrek

lesvegas

literally how it feels

welpnotagain

ndnbutch

sometimes i talk about how awful it was to feel trapped by my daily makeup routine and how i couldn’t leave the house without putting on a full face and it played a major role in the misery of my high school experience because i had to spend so much extra time getting ready in the mornings and that followed me into my early 20s as well and it was hell and it was so incredibly liberating to go through the slow and uncomfortable but ultimately essential process of getting my bare face back and having makeup be an optional accessory instead of a mandatory uniform. and the response always tends to be ah yes of course, because of your trans and your masculine. and it’s like aha so close! actually! I think if I ended up being a feminine cis woman I also still would not deserve even a second of that shit! I think trans women and nonbinary people and every human alive should have the option to leave the house without a single cosmetic product ever touching their face! but thanks for playing!

anarchistmemedistro

Attackers explain how an anti-spam defense became an AI weapon.

megaceros

love that energy

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rottingtrouble-child

I saw this video about a doctor who performed an MRI on a 5 year old and discovered she essentially had “brain damage” from excessive iPad use, as the white matter in her brain couldn’t form properly due to an understimulated environment.

Hmm it’s almost like there’s supposed to be adult figures responsible for monitoring her screen time and making sure she develops properly… certainly this isn’t the result of neglect at the hands of her parents…

ozempicofficial

rupurteblr

i call this one “using tumblr as a person of color”

might update with more images at some point

the-uncanny-dag

Some of the ones I've accumulated

coldthrenody

a couple of addition to this post

coldthrenody

another

hotvampireadjacent

catchymemes

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layton-heritage-posts

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layton-heritage-posts

ABSOLUTELY CATACLYSMIC WRONG BLOG MOMENT. WORST MOMENT OF MY CAREER.

ladymirdan

moonxshape

I'm in this photo and I have no issue with it WHATSOEVER

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Be myself? What kind of garbage advice is that?